Draig Cryf
by Kedern
Summary: I'm bad at titles. Worse at summaries. Jess investigating on her own brings her problems. The others try to find her.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone (if anyone is reading this that is)!**

**This is my first Primeval fanfiction.**

**I must admit that I know nothing about what I'm writing (that is: dinosaurs, drugs, English, London…) even if I try to research about it the most I can.**

**English is not my native language, forgive me for all the mistakes here and there. All constructive criticism accepted!**

**The characters may be OOC, considering the topic. I don't think the idea is new (if I am writing about it, I must have heard about it somewhere else).**

**I'm putting a T-rating on this, for the descriptions and some swearing, but as told before, considering English is not my native language, I don't really know the severity of the swearing.**

**Disclaimer: Primeval and its universe don't belong to me. It belongs to its creators and probably the ones broadcasting it. I only own the plot and the boxing guys. I'm not even sure about the plot.**

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The day was still young at the A.R.C. Everyone was busy doing what they were used to doing during "non anomaly alert", so far so good. Abby was checking her "pets", happy they had just escaped slaughter, Connor was typing a program that himself only was likely to understand, Lester was filling paperwork, his dream work, soldiers were training and Jess was going over hours of CCTV footage.

That kind of calm was relaxing for those who had the last days busy between chasing a legend, rescuing a damsel in distress, learning how to use a computer or trying to coordinate everything and everyone.

"Seems like I didn't miss all the fun."

Becker's voice creeping behind Jess had her jumping on her seat.

"Becker! I thought you'd come back only tomorrow!"

"Aw, didn't miss me? I'm wounded" fake-pouted the soldier, putting a hand to his heart. "And, just so you know, we _are_ tomorrow."

Jess checked on her computer. It was indeed the day Becker was due back.

"I'm sorry… With yesterday, I had to make sure all the reports were coherent between themselves, and then call organizations to prevent people from…" feeling she was rambling, she cut herself. "I guess I just spent the night without noticing." She blushed seeing his incredulous stare, before reverting her attention back to the monitors.

"Err… Matt wants you to see him for briefing" the FC added without turning from the screens.

"Alright. Any idea where-"

"Armory" Jess cut before he had time to finish his question.

Becker chuckled.

"Right. Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Becker gone, Jess berated herself for being in a bubble when it came to her work. She surely should have noticed the shifts changing and new people coming to the A.R.C. for the day. Unfortunately, as FC, she also had to link the reports to what she recorded during the mission, to cover the tracks, and, the day before being an unusual day with Matt leaving the mission to go to save Emily, the "cover the tracks" thingy had not been applied_ only_ to the public eye.

She was going through police reports when something called for her attention.

_18-01-2011 – 11:45pm – Bulphan_

_Three teenagers discover corpse of big lizard. Doesn't belong to any neighbouring zoo. Found evidence of fight._

The rest of the report was describing the "big lizard" and the details about its discovery. Opening the pictures of the scene, Jess found the lizard very alike all those creatures the A.R.C. had met so far.

She opened a communication line with her computer.

"Matt? Can you come? I have something to show you."

"Coming. See you in five." came the answer.

Less than five minutes later, Becker and Matt joined Jess.

"What is it?" the team leader asked.

"I was going through police reports when I found this" she said while selecting the file on the screen.

Both men analyzed the documents.

"Looks a lot like a Minmi. Herbivorous. Early Cretaceous."

"Minmi? Not something-aurus?" asked Jess.

"Nah, it was found in Australia on Minmi Crossing, hence the name" explained Matt.

"Has there been any anomaly near the site?" enquired Becker.

"No, that's weird" the FC answered while clicking around and opening programs. "And I checked thirty kilometers around. Nothing in three months."

"Well the one from yesterday-"

"-was being detected on and off by the ADD for a while already" cut Jess, still checking. "And here, there's absolutely nothing."

"Another point I don't understand is the state of the creature. I mean, that's quite big, surely not as big as some we've already met but still. To do this amount of damage, it should have been a big thing like a truck" pointed Becker.

"Already checked. There is no report of any other accident in the area. No road accident, nor construction site accident, nor any other that could have had this impact."

"Never mind that, it looks that this thing has been beaten up pretty badly" added the soldier. "And I don't mean by another one" he continued before Jess could say anything. "I mean by someone, like, a person. Look at these" he showed some injuries of the creatures to Matt and Jess. "And these. It doesn't look like it was made at random. Impairing but not lethal, as if to make the creature last longer."

The other two looked puzzled.

"What are you suggesting?"

"I'm suggesting that this creature has been found by someone else than those teenagers. Once dead, they dropped it there."

"But why hasn't this _'s__omeone'_ told anyone? I mean, if somebody finds a dinosaur, the first thing he or she will think about is putting it on TV, isn't it?" enquired the tech.

"Apparently not. Becker and I will go to the station to dig a bit deeper."

Both men took black boxes and walked away.

Meanwhile, Jess tried to "dig deeper" herself, searching through the Web about "creature sightings" or other oddities in the area.

Lester came to her.

"Where have those two gone to?"

"Erm, there was a police report about a lizard looking a lot like one of our reptilian creatures. So they went to investigate themselves."

"Why haven't they gathered a team to stop the creature?" Lester asked, surprised before the carelessness of the men.

"Well, the creature's dead already. Becker found the injuries the creature was subjected to were weird, as if it was someone and not something who did this to it. So they went to check if anybody knows about it."

"Ah, I see. Well, keep me posted if anything happens" he said while making his way to his office.

"Yes sir."

An hour and a half later, without any result from the network, Jess was about to go back home when Becker and Matt came back.

"So?"

"So that was really weird. There's definitely something behind it" Becker seemed bothered.

"What makes you say so?"

"There were marks of taser all over the creature" explained Matt. "Someone must have tried to tame it, or at least control it. The bones were broken but all differently, as if it has received many shocks instead of a big one like a truck. I still don't understand what they wanted to do with it…"

"I didn't find anything else. It seems that it has been the only event in the area for a long time."

"Maybe within a few days something else will appear?" hoped Becker. "But for the moment, we can't do anything. Which means that you go home and have some rest" he all but ordered the young woman.

"I'm fine. I still have to finish my shift and check on some reports-"

"-on which you have already checked, hence why you didn't leave last night" cut the man.

"Jess, as your boss, I tell you to go back home. Connor will take over with the ADD" Matt insisted.

"Fine, I wasn't going to stay much longer anyway" Jess agreed reluctantly.

She closed some of the programs, made some other takedown, the two men still behind her.

"I _will_ leave" she promised.

"The question is not _whether_ you will leave, rather _when_ you will leave" Becker snorted.

"Just a few things-"

Becker took the keyboard out of her reach, then dumped on her her jacket and her bag, swiveled the chair and made her stand up.

"Fine, fine, I'll leave now!" Jess relented.

Matt chuckled in front of her behavior.

"I see you can handle it from here, mate. See you tomorrow Jess!" he went away.

Jess was about to leave to when she sensed Becker still behind her.

"What? You'll follow me to my car to be sure I won't go back?" she sarcastically asked.

"I don't trust you not to."

She blushed and made her way to the exit, Becker still following her. Accordingly to her earlier statement, he did follow her to her car and waited until she exited the parking lot before going back to the main building.

Jess was aware Matt and Becker were right about her going back home, but she really didn't feel tired. On the other hand, if an alert went off while she was sleepy, it could be dangerous for those on the field.

Back home, she made herself some tea before having a shower and deciding to take a nap. Before finishing those tasks however, she went to check a hunch on her computer. There, she accessed hospital files in the area where had been discovered the Minmi and found that several men had been admitted because of traumas. Searching deeper, she learnt that those men were high on some stimulating drug and seemed to have been taking it for a long time. All showed cuts and blows, broken bones and sometimes internal bleeding. Curious, Jess went to look for what the men had in common. After a few clicks, she noted that all of those patients were members of a little boxing club, the Draig Cryf, though all had denied being hurt there.

Jess pondered a moment about telling Matt or Becker about it.

_"Knowing them, they'll tell me to wait for tomorrow. But tomorrow, someone else may be beaten as badly too."_

She chose to leave a note for Abby and Connor once they got back home, in case she hadn't finished yet, put on a jacket and drove off.


	2. Chapter 2

The Draig Cryf was a little building in the outskirts of the city. A big red dragon was painted on top of the entrance.

_"The Strong Dragon, eh?"_ Jess translated.

Seeing light through the little windows, she considered once again to tell someone but stopped herself.

_"It's the middle of the afternoon and there's traffic. It's not like something can happen."_

She exited her car and made her way to the building.

Entering the club, she was overwhelmed with the strong perspiration smell that filed the unique room. Looking around, she saw no ring, but many punching bags, weights, working out material, and a sort of cage.

"Can I help ya with somethin'?" a voice behind her made her jump.

"Oh, er, hi…er…I'm…" _"Congratulations, Jess, you didn't even think of a lie before entering, very clever"_ "My boyfriend! My boyfriend is looking for a boxing club in the area, and, as he has much work to do these days, he asked me if I could, er, scout a bit around. We just moved in so, we still have to settle." The young woman rambled.

The big man in front of her, perfect stereotype of the hard-core boxer – tattoos and big muscles associated with a hard face – seemed to consider the lie for a moment, before buying it.

"Well, lady-"

"Lex, are you trying to scare off a potential member?" a voice said from the other side of the gym, much friendlier than the aforementioned Lex.

Another man, muscles still on but not overdone, jogged to them.

"Hello, I'm Chris. Are you thinking about joining us?" the man held out his hand.

"I'm Jess" she shook his hand, smiling "and I'm scouting for my boyfriend."

Big Man left them then.

"Aww… Boyfriend? I should have known that such a beautiful creature like you would already be taken by a lucky man."

The FC couldn't help but blush before the compliment

"Er…yes, I am. Taken, I mean. He's ex-military."

"Oh, and the restless man wants something to hit on, doesn't he?" the other guy smiled all knowingly.

"Well, ever since he came back, he's looking for a decent club to practice a bit. But, with the work…"

"I totally understand. Shall I give you a tour then?"

She nodded and followed him.

"-and finally here you have the free space for the fights, it helps to practice with someone."

"If you don't mind me asking, what's the cage for" Jess inquired.

"This was for the former owners, they were specialized in free fighting. We obviously don't so we don't use it. But we never really thought about removing it. We often hang stuff on it anyway" Chris explained all smiles.

Actually, the guy had always been smiling during the tour, and Jess was becoming a bit creeped out by this.

"Is…free fighting dangerous?"

"Well, it can be, considering you have fewer rules than for any other fighting sport. But the guys doing it know their job, a big injury is rare."

Talking about it, they both approached the cage. On the net, Jess noted a red-brownish stain, and saw the same one on the floor.

Blood. And fresh.

"I'm very sorry to ask, but have you got restrooms?" Jess made a guilty face.

"Of course, they're that way" Chris chuckled, showing the opposite of the room.

"Thanks"

Jess hurried in the direction given, without giving a backward glance.

There, she found a corridor with the locker rooms on a side, and a "Staff only" door on the other side. Checking she was alone, she quietly opened the forbidden door before slipping in the room.

The room was little furnished. A desk with nothing on it, a chair, a carpet. Considering the size of the club, Jess was surprised not to see any paper to fill or other junk anywhere. A buzzing sound could be heard. Going its way, Jess found herself in front of a wall. Coming closer, she noticed a handle and "opened" the wall. The wall was hiding a refrigerator full of little unlabelled vials, similar to the ones containing medicine to be injected. She took two of them and closed the door. About to leave, she heard the floor creaking on a certain spot. Removing the carpet, she saw a trap door leading to the basement.

"Is it your boyfriend who taught you how to snoop?" Chris voice behind her asked.

Without having any time to turn around, Jess felt a needle in her neck, and all became black.


	3. Chapter 3

Connor and Abby found weird having to open the apartment door with their own keys, Matt having told them Jess had been sent home considering she spent the night at the A.R.C.

They found the note on the desk.

_Went to check on something. Be back before 8. Heart. Jess_

Writing unmistakably Jess-ish. Message not totally.

"Where has she gone like that?" Abby wondered.

"I don't know, but she obviously was wrong. It's passed nine" noted Connor. "Maybe her date lasted longer than she thought?"

"_'Went to check on something'_, Connor. I don't really think it was about a date."

"Do you think…" the young man began, without really knowing what to say next.

"Maybe we can wait until ten and then call her. If anything she didn't see the time, whatever she is doing."

"And if she doesn't answer?"

"We'll see."

They called for takeout and ate. Both were becoming a bit fidgety about Jess.

"It's five to ten. We should call her" the blonde stated.

She took her cell and used speed dial.

_"The number you have dialed cannot be reached as it is out of the service area or the phone is powered off. The number-"_

Abby closed her phone, frowning.

"Voicemail?" asked Connor.

"Worse. It can't be reached. She can't be out of the service area and I highly doubt Jess would, on purpose, shut down her phone so that we don't reach at least her voicemail" the young woman worried.

"Maybe we can call the A.R.C. She said _'check on something'_ and she spent the last two days at the A.R.C."

"Call Matt. Becker would kill her if he thinks she put herself in danger."

"_You_ call Matt. _I_'ll go check her computer."

Abby dialed the number.

"Matt?"

"Abby? Something wrong?"

"Well, I was wondering if Jess was working on a project these days."

"No she is not. Why are you asking? Where is she?" Matt began to worry.

"She's not home. She left a note saying she'll be there at 8 but-"

"It is already past ten."

"We can't reach her phone. Shut down or out of service area."

"Damn, she must have found something!" Matt scolded.

"What? Found what?"

"Abby, you and Connor better go back to the A.R.C., Becker is still here. We'll tell you there."

"We will but-"

Matt had hung up.

A bit irritated, Abby strolled to Connor.

"Apparently, she checked some hospital files…"

"Isn't that illegal?"

"Well, if we can…" the programmer said with a smile.

Going further, he added.

"She also checked about a boxing club, the Draig Cryf."

"Do you see Jess taking boxing lessons?"

"Not really."

"Then let's go. Matt and Becker are waiting for us at the A.R.C." she went to put on a jacket.

"Wait, you called Becker?"

"No, I didn't. Apparently, Jess found something the three of them were discussing. He would not tell me more" she shrugged.

Connor, having finished putting the files on his USB stick, followed her.

* * *

Becker was pacing furiously.

"You think she went investigating by herself?"

"I don't know. She said she hadn't found anything here, I doubt she found something more at home" Matt commented. "Jess is a smart girl, she would not have gone by herself."

"She's still missing and unreachable. No phone GPS. No car GPS. No black box. _That_ is not Jess" Becker replied a bit harshly.

"We gotta wait for Abby and Connor, they may know something more. You'll see, once it turns out it is nothing, you can yell at her at your heart's content and force her to wear a black box" the Irishman smiled.

"I don't know why she isn't wearing one in the first place" scolded the captain.

"Maybe because, oh, I don't know, she's _never_ on the field?"

Connor and Abby entered the room, preventing Becker from retorting.

"What's going on?" Connor began.

With a sigh, Matt went to Jess's post.

"Jess found a police report about the death of a big lizard. Turns out that the lizard is a Minmi, badly beaten up, with broken bones and taser marks. But nothing unusual in the area. We thought about discussing it tomorrow, to see if any new report had been written meanwhile" Matt put on the screen the files and the pictures.

"That explains a bit what I found" Connor stepped in, plugging the stick and opening it. "She's been through hospital files around Bulphan and found similar cases of beaten up guys. All high on a sort of steroid" he showed the files. "She also researched about a boxing club in the area, the Draig Cryf. But I don't know…Hang on."

He typed a bit, clicked, typed again.

"What?" Becket got impatient.

"Just waaai… There. Got it."

"Got wha-"

"The club. All of the guys are members. She saw the connection."

"Why the hell didn't she tell us?" Becker exploded.

"Considering we sent her home this morning, she must have thought we wouldn't want to go today, and when to check before coming back to us" Matt tried to calm things down.

"Damn it, she has absolutely _no_ experience on the field, and she went alone. That girl's supposed to be smart!"

Abby intervened.

"She is. She just doesn't see the danger the way we do. She sees it from her computer, when we're out. She knows what danger is. We must focus on getting her back for now, you can yell at her later. What do we do now?"

Matt took charge.

"This seems to be a little building, I doubt the real thing is there. Connor, find everything you can about the members, the owners, everything. Check if there anything unusual since Jess has last done. Becker, Abby, we go to the club, and try and find anything there. Connor, in case we're separated, you coordinate us."

"Roger, sir."

All turned to Connor.

"Er… 'Alright, I'll do it'?"

The three went to get some weapons and drove off to the club.

* * *

During the journey, Connor was sharing what he was finding.

"Three more beaten up guys. Same symptoms, same drug. Another 'lizard' found. Could be more. The police are getting suspicious."

"We'll see about that later. Anything about the owner?"

"Christopher Sagara. No criminal record. Not even a speeding ticket. That's weird…"

"What is, Connor?" Abby asked, knowing otherwise he would mull over it without thinking about his first task.

"Well, _'Sagara'_. Weird name isn't it? I mean, what's worse is that the previous owners were the Chidoris. And Sagara's second name is _Sousuke_. So either his parents had a sure sense of humor-"

"How so?"

"Come on guys! Sousuke Sagara! Full Metal Panic! Shoji Gatoh and Shiki Douji!"

"Connor!"

"Alright! Full Metal Panic is a series of novels written by those I mentioned. They were adapted into manga and anime. About a guy having to be the bodyguard of a beautiful girl, but that guy's never been anywhere apart from battlefields so-"

"Connor…" Abby's tone was warning.

"The guy was Sousuke Sagara and the girl Kaname Chidori."

"You're kidding?"

"No. And what's more, is that those novels were published for the first time in 1998, so unless the guy is twelve…"

"So basically, the whole thing is fake?" Matt asked.

"Yes, it is. His social number began appearing only three months ago. Before that, no Sergeant Catastrophe."

"Huh?"

"Another name for Sousuke Sagara."

"Try and search for something else then."

"On it."

While talking they arrived at the club. No light, no sound.

"Abby and Becker, take the front door. I'll take the back."

Together, they entered with precaution the small building, joining in the middle of the main room.

"Seems clear" Matt noted.

"Let's check the other rooms."

Like Jess, they went in the corridor with the staff room and the locker rooms. Nothing was in the locker rooms.

They opened the staff room and entered chaos.

There were papers everywhere, the chair was on the floor and the desk upside down. The door of the refrigerator was open and there were broken vials on the floor.

Abby crouched down, took a plastic bag nearby and used it to retrieve one of the vials. Seeing something shining on the floor, Matt picked it up.

"Is that a ring?"

"It's Jess's" Becker said. "At work she puts it on a necklace, it's too big for her. Outside, she puts it as an actual ring because she can pay more attention to it. It must have slipped off her finger when…"

He trailed off, not wanting to think about what had happened.

Letting her torch light the floor, Abby discovered the trap door.

"Guys? Look at this."

Matt opened it, then climbed down the stairs, followed by Abby then Becker.

If the room upstairs was chaos, they had just entered hell.

There were cages everywhere, as well as blood. Several prehistoric creatures could be seen slaughtered, some dismembered, others torn apart. None alive.

"Oh my god!" muttered Abby.

Going through the limbs, they found out that all the blood didn't belong to the creatures.

"There are two men here!" called Matt.

"Three other over here!"

"What the hell were they doing here?" Abby burst.


	4. Chapter 4

Jess woke up light-headed and…in a cell.

"Aw… Sleeping Beauty is finally awake, isn't she?" someone cooed falsely.

"Chris?" she managed to utter, barely.

"In the flesh! Well, actually, you'll have to work the flesh a bit better if you wanna survive but other than that, you got everything right! So tell me, what brought me out? The drugs? The lizards? Tell me!"

He seemed almost happy about this.

"What…are you talki-"

"Oh come on, Jess! If that's even your name. Well, I doubt you can forge an ID like me so let's say your real name is Jess. So Jess, really. A girlfriend scouting a boxing club for her boyfriend but snooping around? Is there even a boyfriend?"

"I still don't-"

"Oh whatever. It's not like anyone will ever find you know. Don't think about GPS tracks, I destroyed your phone and drove your car so far away that, even if you have friends looking for you, they won't ever find you. And about your clothes…"

Startled, Jess sat up and examined herself.

"Don't tell me you're one of those guys with a Xena fantasy…" she managed to snarl despite her uneasiness.

She had been totally dressed up as a gladiator. Leather stripped skirt, leather corset, silver bracelet on her biceps.

"No, not really Xena. I was much more a fan of Gabrielle, particularly at the end, when the two finally make out… ouah! Moment in History. Anyway, see that beautiful bracelet? It is your…how to put it simply…your 'don't you dare escaping' bracelet. Be proud, you're the first human to wear it! This little thingy is controlled by the remote you see here" he took a little cylindrical object from his pocket "and one bad move, one bad word, and you'll feel a pain so intense that it'll teach you not to mess with anyone in here. Except the lizards of course."

"Son of a b- Aaaaaahhh" Jess cried out, convulsing on her bed.

"Now, now, no need to be so noisy, it'll pass you know. Now, you know the things you mustn't do, and the ones you must. Isn't that brilliant?"

Numbed by the electrical shock she just received, Jess couldn't say a word.

"I know I know, you're so astonished before my genius. It'll pass. I'm a man like any other you know? Probably better than this boyfriend of yours though."

"Once he finds out where I am, he'll kill you" Jess muttered between her teeth.

Other shock.

"My, my, you sure know how to bring a man down, don'tcha? Anyway, as I told you before, no one will ever be able to find you here. Totally secured. You'll see. You'll love it!"

Chris walked away then. Jess could only let black overcome her.

* * *

She woke up what seemed several days later but what where, according to Chris, merely several hours.

"Come on, I'll give you a tour!"

Summoning two guys hiding in the shadows, he let them enter the cell to take Jess's arms.

"Alright, let's begin with your companions."

He let her see through a one-way mirror a bunch of people. Some were playing cards, other were fighting. All were having bruises and bad cuts. Men, women. Teenagers.

"See, they don't really need a bracelet as beautiful as yours 'cause they're kinda here willingly. Business you know. Money. They all need it. And they can have it easily! What's a couple of fights compared to a whole life of hard labor? Huh?"

Jess, still hazy, couldn't really see the connection between everything. The Minmi. The fighters. And finally, the dizzy feeling she had.

"Drugs…" she breathed.

"And once again, in the flesh! You surely are a clever warrior, aren'tcha? Aren'tcha?" he was poking her cheeks, much like a grandma would do to her grandson.

"Now, let's follow the guide! Once you vanquish the warriors you face – because I'm sure you'll vanquish them – you level up : here you have a magnificent range of furious and strong dragons, a bit like in the Middle Ages! Isn't that cool?"

He opened a door leading to a room full of cells. But the prisoners here weren't humans, no, they were not. They were creatures. From the past, most probably, she doubted they could have had some of the future, way too dangerous.

_"Once Becker comes here, he'll call Abby and she'll slaughter you."_

The animals were ill-looking, sad. Their cells were their size, if not smaller. They couldn't move. She could recognize a couple of Minmis, and several other species.

"How did you-"

"Now now, this is a secret my dear. Let's not be too curious about it, shall we? Now you better do warms-up to prepare yourself for tonight. Special show! Just for you. Fantastic!"

He left her then, and the two other men led her back to her cell.

Alone, she began to ponder.

_"Alright, this guy's seriously messed up. He finds creatures and captures them to organize a big fight between humans and creatures. That's crazy.  
The drugs are obviously a bonus. When under them, you don't feel danger. You just go after it. He must have given me some right after kidnapping me, I just wanted to scratch his eyes out.  
Becker will kill me. He'll find me, and he'll kill me. After making a speech about not wandering off alone. Oh God. I'm dead either way."_

The two big guys opened the cell. One held a syringe.

"Please, no. Don't please!"

She tried to fight back but to no avail. They were way to strong. She felt a rush in her blood, and all was black again.

* * *

"It seems the dose is too strong for her structure. Give her three quarters only next time, and then increase step by step. She's already addicted anyway, she'll need it."

Jess could hear the voices even if she could not open her eyes yet. She had fainted. Again. True, it was because of the drug, not because of her emotions but still.

"You just take her for the final battle. No monsters tonight. She'll fight three in a row."

"OK."

"Let me know if she does anything else. And don't – I repeat _don't _– touch the merchandise."

"We won't."

"Très bien. Que le spectacle commence! Ça va être géant!"*

_"Fight? __I never fought! Even those self-defense lessons at the A.R.C. were for 'field staff' only!"_

She was shaken roughly.

"Girl! Wake up! It's your turn!"

She was led then through a dozen of corridors, not alike the ones she saw earlier.

"Where are we going?"

No answer.

She was thrown in a cell, but an in-ground one. Above her, dozens of people, probably hundreds of them, were watching, excited, impatient, anxious.

_"They are…watching the whole thing… as entertainment?"_

On her left, a noise. Part of the cell opened, revealing a man, mid-twenties, wearing only trousers. He was in a bad shape, cuts and bruises everywhere. But his eyes…his eyes showed so much lust, blood lust. Jess instantly tensed. A bell went off. The guy lunged at her. She tried to escape, several times. The guy finally hit her on the head. She went to the ground.

"Fight Gaby, fight!"

From afar, she could see Chris shouting at her. She slowly shook her head.

Then she was shocked. Pretty badly…

…and she was thrown back in her cell. Bloody.

"My, my, what a fighter you were tonight! A-ma-zing! Ma-gni-fique! Sensationnelle! Une déesse!* Walkyrie! We would have thought you were Athena in person!"

Jess was looking at her bloodied hands. Then at her bloodied body.

"What… what happened?" she asked shakily.

"Didn't you hear it? You were totally gorgeous! What a fight! Never saw one like this before. Well, the fact that you didn't kill any of your opponents was a bit of a downer, though. But the fight, that was… une pure merveille! Du grand art! Un régal pour les yeux!"*

Jess couldn't think.

"My, my, have you lost your tongue? You sure were shouting a lot down there. Well then, I'll let you rest. Next time will be with the biggest ones! You still have time though."

He exited the cell after a little bow.

"J'en reviens pas!*" she could hear him shouting.

She threw herself on her bed, and cried.

* * *

**I just went back to my earlier chapters a saw I hadn't translated the French phrases (as they seem clear for me, obviously).**

**1. "Very well. Let the show begin. It's gonna be great!"**

**2."...Mar-vel-lous! Sensational! A goddess!..."**

**3. "...truly splendid! Brilliant! A feast for the eyes!"**

**4. "I can't believe it!"**


	5. Chapter 5

Finding nothing at the boxing club, the others had no choice but to come back to the A.R.C.

Connor got up.

"Found anything else?"

"Her ring" Becker said soberly.

Everyone was down. The ring was the ultimate proof that Jess had indeed been there, and was no more.

"We have to tell Lester" Matt decided.

"It's almost the morning shift. Everybody will be here soon" Abby agreed.

"What do we do now?"

Seeing no one had an answer, Connor continued.

"I'm going back home. Jess's computer is probably as strong as this one, and I'll be alone on it. Philip won't be breathing on my neck and I'll need all the time I can have to find things."

"Things about what?" Matt was surprised. "You told us that the guy was a dead end."

"I'll find something. No one can appear from nowhere. I'll search it, and I'll find it. I'll call you if I have anything new."

He took his coat, ready to leave.

"Wait!"

Becker threw him a black box.

"On. Always. Everywhere you go."

"Got it" Connor nodded.

He then took his leave.

"And in the meantime, we can do absolutely nothing" Matt groaned.

"Connor's right" Abby reasoned. "No one appears nor disappear out of thin air. There's gotta be a trace somewhere. And Connor will find it."

Matt threw the ring to Becker.

"Here. Keep it."

Becket stared at the ring for a moment, before putting it around the chain he had. He then put the whole thing under his T-shirt.

"I… I'm going to make some tea and coffee. Anyone?"

"I'll come with you" Matt replied.

They both went away, leaving Becker alone.

_"You better be alright Jess."_

* * *

"He is taking it hard."

"And you didn't see him when Connor and you were gone" Matt retorted.

"Lester put him in charge of our safety. He's got that superhero complex telling him he has to save the world. But he doesn't seem to understand that he can't."

Abby put the kettle on the fire, before preparing a pot.

"Jess is part of the team. She was never supposed to be in danger. That's worse. The one he thought he could be sure would never be hurt, coincidentally the youngest and the weakest, is now god only knows where, facing god only knows what" Matt added.

"And that's _Jess_."

"Meaning?"

"That's Jess_ 'I'm given chocolate by a certain captain'_ Parker. I think it adds up to the rest."

"Could be."

The kettle blew, Abby stood to prepare tea.

"Jess is not weak. She seems so but she isn't. Whatever she'll face, she'll face it head high.

"Something happened, before coming here. Connor and I tried to know what, without invading her privacy, without much luck. But this 'something', that was something rough. The Jess all colors and fun, that's not totally her. A big part, yes, because she wants that 'something' behind her. It made her strong. Whatever it had been.

"Look at it this way : she's our field coordinator. A highly important spot, considering what we face on the field. She has to coordinate us and is basically responsible of our lives out there. She has to deal with lots of pressure. And she's only nineteen. But she's tough. She's facing it. And she'll face whatever she meets wherever she is. She'll face it long enough so we can have time to find her. And she'll be safe."

"I hope you're right, Abby. I hope you are."

* * *

James Lester understood something wasn't right the first step he made into the A.R.C. He casually made his way to his office, and waited.

_"Three, two, one."_

Knock, knock.

"Come in!"

There stood Maitland, Anderson and Becker. All looked as if they had been told their whole families had been found dead.

"And where is the fourth Musketeer?"

"Connor? At home. That's why we're here."

Lester took a look towards the ADD.

"And where is Miss Parker?"

Ah. Obviously what mattered. After a few seconds, Anderson took a step forward.

"Can I?" he pointed Lester's computer.

After a sign of approval, the Irishman set to work. He accessed all the files they all had seen, plus those found by Connor when they were at the club.

"Yesterday morning, Jess found a police report about a dead big lizard. A creature. Becker and I went to investigate-"

"Yes, yes, I asked her about that already."

"Well, the lizard, a Minmi, had been beaten up. Taser marks and all. There was nothing else anywhere, so we" (turned to Becker) "told her to go back home, considering she spent the night here. She did, but found some more and decided to go by herself. Ever since, she's M.I.A. No black box, no GPS whatsoever. She found out that beaten up men were showing up at nearby hospitals, high. All members of the same boxing club. She went there – we have evidence – but obviously got abducted."

"Is there more?"

"There's more." Matt sighed. "The owner is a dead end. Took the name of some manga hero. When we got here, last night, there was no more. Everything important was gone. The place was a mess. We found a trap door leading to cages, cells containing several creatures and humans, dead, slaughtered, dismembered. Bloody mess. We don't know yet what happened there, but it was bad, very bad."

Lester was calm. Abnormally calm.

"What are you going to do?"

"Connor's searching everything he can about the owner. He's sure he can still find something about it. Past owners of the club are dead ends too. We can only rely on the owner."

"And the vial…" breathed Abby, remembering suddenly.

"The vial? What vial?" Lester was intrigued.

"There were vials…crashed on the floor. I took one with me. I'll go make some analysis now."

Abby exited the office.

Silence between the three men.

"And about you two?" Lester asked.

"We-"

Matt couldn't finish. The ADD blared. Anomaly detected.

"You will do your job, as usual. Gather a team, and call back Temple."

"But sir-"

"Anderson, I know that Mr. Temple is doing something very important now, but your team will need a FC. And as for now, he probably is the only one able to understand the whole system Miss Parker was using."

"Fine. I'll call him back. Becker, gather your team. We go as soon as I call Connor."

Both men exited the office.

_"And here I thought you'll be the one causing the fewer problems Miss Parker."_

* * *

"Allô allô, Planète Gaby? Ici la Terre!"*

Jess was no longer surprised by his visits. She hardly slept, always alert. She considered it her little victory: snatching from him the satisfaction of surprising her.

It had been three nights since her fight. She knew it. Hell, she was paid to notice little things in order to help her teams on the field! Her teams. Matt, Becker, Abby, Connor. They must be worried. Or probably angered that there's no one to be their FC. Anyway, without GPS tracks nor black box, it's not like she can be found. And to say she's the one insisting they bring their black boxes with them at all times… She hoped they were doing well.

She knew tonight was the night, she would fight again. She doubted it was with humans though. _"The biggest ones"_ he had said. It could only mean one thing.

She couldn't remember the fight last time, the shock made her black out. She knew she hadn't fainted, the blood and her hands and the praises of her captor attesting so. But she could _not_ remember a thing.

What she remembered though, were the fainting spells after the next three injections. But it wasn't happening anymore. She could feel the rush in her veins, and the feeling of being high, less and less long. She knew she was becoming addicted. Who wouldn't be, with four shots a day!

The two big guys came into her cell and took her by the arms. Like the first time, she was led to the big cell. Above her, fewer people.

_"You have to pay more to be more entertained."_

She was not ready. She tried. Warm ups, stretching. But can you really prepare yourself to fight things that were supposed to be dead million years before?

Then she saw it. A Minmi. "_Herbivorous_" had said Matt. It wouldn't hurt a human. Then she saw all those taser marks Becker and Matt told her about. This creature had been tortured. It didn't deserve to be here. She thought about Abby and her will to save the menagerie. Jess couldn't bring herself to hurt that thing.

"Gaby, fight it!"

No. Like last time, she didn't want to do it. But she wouldn't make the same mistake showing so.

Unfortunately, he understood.

Shock. She moved toward the creature that had been shocked too. She fought it. Punches, kicks, slaps. The creature groaned and tried to fight back. Blood was pouring from the Minmi, but Jess couldn't help it. She was given knives, swords. She used them. Cut through the flesh. She could see blood everywhere. The creature was still fighting back, but weakly.

Then it fell.

And it was over.

Jess was led back to her cell.

"What's with you and leaving them all alive? Seriously! You see a badass lizard in front of you, but no, of course not, you won't kill it!"

Chris grabbed her chin roughly to make her face him, their faces inches apart.

"Before you know it, I _will_ make you kill. That's a promise."

On that note, he left her cell.

Like last time, Jess threw herself on her bed and cried. But unlike last time, she could remember everything she had done.

* * *

**Translation :**

**1. "Hello, hello! Earth to Gaby Planet!"**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Probably my shortest chapter.**

**I'm changing my disclaimer to "I own nothing except the plot after the fight thingy (seeing that, apparently, the idea of fight creatures is not mine, I should've known), the boxing men, and the Kaduceys".**

**That might cover everything.**

**I'm not pretending to own any of the cultural references here, whose sole purpose is to lead the readers in a world they already know about.**

* * *

What they thought would take a few hours, a few days at most, turned out to be weeks.

Abby had long since analyzed the vial. It was the drug alright, the drug the guys from the hospital were coming high with. And had died with. It was a sort of steroid, getting better scores, better stamina, better strength. But it was also highly addictive. These guys died of withdrawal, and they were taking it only for a few shots, five at most. The components were very common, it was impossible to trace the source from here.

Abby busied herself with the menagerie, and with trying to ease everything for Connor.

Connor, who replaced Jess at the ADD and as FC, _"temporarily" _as he stressed, as he always stressed. Abby and he were gone for a year, and they came back. Of course, they were several million years before, but it hadn't mattered. They came back. And so would Jess. During the day, he would take his shift as "temporary" FC, leading the teams in the field. Philip had stopped asking for his services long ago. At nights, he would search everything he could, any hint to know where Jess might be.

Matt was trying to hold his team together. He was the leader, he had to take decisions. He couldn't get his mind sidetracked with Jess, looking for any evidence there might be each time he and his team were entering a building. Even if he couldn't help it.

Becker was the worst. The one that had been opening up little by little with Cutter and his sidekicks was totally withdrawn now. Talking only to bark orders, he was not himself anymore. It wasn't rare to see him reaching inside his shirt to pick his chain with Jess's ring on it. He was supposed to protect his team. He had failed her. The time spent at the shooting range and training grew three fold. Leaving him enough time to sleep (barely) and eat (as much). When he wasn't forgetting to do so.

Lester was watching the members of his best team falling apart without being able to do a thing. Sure, he pulled some strings, called everyone he knew could be some kind of help, in vain.

The whole A.R.C. was feeling the loss of Jess. Some might have not known her, but all were affected somehow, like a snowball effect.

She was still M.I.A.

But four persons were fighting tooth and nail to get her back.

* * *

"Gaby, fight it! Gaby!"

Gaby. His obsession with Xena's companion. His French phrases, when he wasn't talking Italian. Chris. She wasn't even sure it was his real name. She heard some "Vince" once. And "Dan". His Colgate smile everytime he talked, even to scold her. But he was not crazy, oh no, a crazy person would not have been able to choreograph this whole dance, the creatures, the drugs, the willing participants, the bets, the cells, her abduction. He was a mastermind of sorts. That much she could admit.

She wasn't crying anymore. She could not.

The shots were killing her, that she was aware of. She could feel it inside. Retching was becoming a habit. She sometimes found blood on the drapes, where were supposed to be her ears, or her nose. Or sometimes while retching too. More blood than food. The shots were done more and more often, with a higher and higher dose. She felt it. The rush wasn't the same. She fought to stay aware. Being _conscious_ was not a problem anymore. She had to stay _aware_ to see what he made her do. He always had to shock her to make her fight. But she wasn't fighting, her body was. For each physical fight, there was a mental one to bring down the effects of the drug added to the shock to finally be able to move by herself. It never worked. But each night she was fighting, she was fighting both wars.

He won a battle though. One night, the creature in front of her was in worse shape than the others. She killed it. He was happy. He was overjoyed. He even hugged her while swirling her around chanting "Gaby, Gaby, Gaby". She did not move.

She forced herself not to move any more than necessary. Going to the fights, going back. The fights occurred almost every night, no need for her to prepare herself. She would not show emotion.

She was thinking about the A.R.C. sometimes, often. How there were doing, what they were thinking about. She wondered if Abby and Connor were still having their "Thursday night movie". But then she wondered why not. She knew they knew that she was not entirely what she pretended to be. Happy Jess. She knew also that they didn't want to invade her privacy. She suspected Becker knew about it too, but accepted her need not to say anything. This less happy side brought by what made her strong enough to endure what she was enduring right now. What taught her, violently, to stay sane whatever the situation was. How to take a beating without moving an inch.

She was thinking about who replaced her, and hoping that whoever it was, he or she better do a great job, or she'd show him or her what it cost endangering her mates.

But that meant going back.

She was always alert, always. Checking the shifts, the staff. Exits. Always. Every little detail. She hadn't found yet, but she was convinced she would.

One day, she would find the flaw in Mister Colgate's little scheme that would make her escape.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I own none of the mangas mentioned later. Neither their universe nor their characters. But I think it had been covered by my last disclaimer.**

**This chapter doesn't have a lot of action, I'm sorry, but I really wanted to show Connor's method to find Jess.**

**I hope I have been mostly right about the manga universe, I can't pretend I know everything about it, I'm just reading them.  
**

**_

* * *

_**The day had been pretty calm at the A.R.C., and Lester had allowed Connor to go home earlier, thinking the young man could use some sleep. The guy had dark rings under his eyes, which made Lester wonder if him, Abby, Matt and Becker were thinking about forming a fashion group.

Instead of taking a nap, Connor went to his usual spot, in front of the computer. He switched it on and came back to his usual sites.

Abby has opened a window this morning to get a breeze going. Even without really being in the mood to, they tried to keep the apartment as living as possible.

While browsing through those sites he could almost read from memory, Connor heard a crash: one of Jess's trinkets had fallen down because of the breeze. He moved to replace it, and went back to the computer.

He paused.

He strolled back to the shelf on which he put the trinket and then he saw it.

He knew how to find Jess.

* * *

Abby entered the apartment a few hours later, and was greeted with a sight she longed to see. Connor was typing flash-speed on his computer, crossing down things on a list and then going back to the screen. He hadn't seen Abby coming back.

"Connor?"

He jumped.

"Abby, I found it!"

"You found what?"

"Let me…" (A few clicks later) "…just…" (Crossed down. Paused. Took a deep breath.)

"Abby, I found a way to find the mysterious owner."

"Connor how-"

"I can't explain for the moment. I need a few hours, I'm almost there. I tracked him down. I'm searching his new identity. But I know how he works. I just need…" (Went back to the screen) "…a few more hours…"

Abby couldn't believe it.

"Should I call Matt and Becker?"

"Bad idea. I'd feel them behind me checking my progress. No, you shouldn't."

"Need anything?"

"Coffee would be fine, thanks."

Abby went to prepare a pot, praying for Connor to be right.

* * *

One hour and forty-seven minutes later, Connor stopped everything. Abby went behind him.

"What's wrong, Con?"

"I found her" he breathed.

"What?"

"I said I found her! I found her Abby, I know where she is now, and I know what she'll be doing tomorrow night!"

Connor stood up suddenly, hugging Abby with all his might.

"We'll get her back tomorrow night!"

As soon as the euphoria wore off, both went to call Becker and Matt.

* * *

Entering the A.R.C., they saw that Lester had joined them, eager like the other two to learn the news.

"What did you say about knowing where Jess is? Why can't we go now?" Becker attacked, for the first time looking alive.

The others were standing close to him, her behavior showing their need for information.

"OK, stop it, all of you" Connor ordered. "I have to tell you how I know about where she is in order for you to understand why we can only get her back tomorrow. Believe me, I want more than anything to get her back, but rushing things now may be losing her forever."

At that statement, all backed down and became silent. Connor walked to the station.

"Alright, do you remember how I told you about the guy? Christopher Sousuke Sagara?"

All nodded.

"It wasn't his first time. Actually, I don't know how I didn't think about it earlier. This guy has always left hints here and there about his location. I don't know exactly who the guy is, that is, his first and real identity, but it doesn't matter to save Jess. This guy has been living on borrowed identities for most of his life, never caught, 'cause never done anything reprehensible." Becker snorted. "Well, never caught about it anyway.

"Surprisingly, Jess's got an amazing bunch of shōnen, and that's what helped me."

"Sorry to interrupt this marvelous speech which I hope will finally get us somewhere, but what the heavens are you talking about?" Lester was lost.

"Mangas. Asian comic books. They're actually so much more than that in their culture but basically, that's it. In Japan, those are divided into five categories, according to which audience it is destined. You have kodomo for children, shōjo for girls, shōnen for boys, seinen for men and josei for women. Roughly, for guys it kicks and for girls it's romance.

"Surprisingly enough, as I said, Jess only owns shōnen and seinen mangas, which is the case of our mysterious club owner too.

"At first, I tried everything going with the _Full Metal Panic_ universe, considering Sagara. Got a hit with Chidori, the girl, but it was the former owners, real Japanese and none of them called Kaname, and I doubt they had anything to do with it. He probably used it as inspiration. Then I went to Michel Limon, coming mid-series, and I got a hit too, in France. Same thing: guys beaten up badly, drugged, and then no more.

"Another shōnen, well-known, _FullMetal Alchemist_. I tried the obvious – Roy Mustang, Edward Elric… - but this manga is so well-known that those names would have drawn attention. I had to dig deeper. Giolio Comanche, the Silver Alchemist, hardly seen, in Italy. Denny Brosh a bit further north.

"And so on with _Slam Dunk_ and other ones until the last manga. The guy's growing up, it's a seinen. For adults. _Real_. I really had to bury myself in the thing to see the connection. The guy, one of the main protagonists, basketball player in wheelchair, is often called in the beginning 'Vince Carter' by another guy. He is the strongest, the one who fights the most in it.

"Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce you Mr. Vincent 'Vince' Togawa."

On the screen could be seen many files, leases, car rents, all under Togawa's name. On the side, a map showing the hospitals in the area having treated men and women with the same symptoms as the ones treated in Bulphan.

Matt sighed.

"Alright, you found him. Now wh-"

"Now we have to get to Jess's location, not his. While searching around the area, for the things few people may know, I hit that."

A click later, and all could see with horror the poster before their eyes.

_"Draig Cryf. Dragons against humans. Who will win? Who will survive?"_

The poster was indicating the place and the way to go to the arena, with mention of all the other "entertainments" there could be.

"The date's tomorrow. That's why we couldn't go before."

"There will be many people tomorrow, too many for whatever security they have there. We have to plan this _now_" Matt clarified. "That would be their weakest moment, we can't let it go."

"Summon whatever team you need, whatever tool you need. You have _carte blanche_ on the express condition that you bring back Jess Parker" stated Lester.

"We cannot be too many" Becker intervened. "If number is their weakness, so will ours be if we were to take too many people. We don't know the place, all will be unknown. We have to be able to retreat quickly if need be."

"I was thinking about Abby, Connor, you and me, how's that for too many?" Matt asked. "Well, of course, if you're willing."

"I would have killed you if you hadn't let me" threatened Abby.

"I would have revived you after to kill you again" added her companion.

All turned to Becker. He stayed silent.

"Aaaaalright, then, what do we know for sure? Connor?"

"We know the location of the site, approximately the number of people. No inside. The entertainment is provided by fights between humans and creatures, probably Minmis or other Archosaurs. But I doubt they tried high-skilled predators considering it should be a fight, for bets. If the outcome of the fight was too obvious, there would be no profit."

"We also know that most of the participants are highly drugged with a kind of steroid, and very addictive. We cannot predict the behaviors of the fighters. Doctors said they were most of the time out of it, in withdrawal, and pretty violent" Abby added. "We have to assume that Jess is under its effects too."

"That means we have to have one of our medical teams on the ready to treat her, and possibly her…injuries" Becker uttered with difficulty. "Two cars, in case one is discovered. Guns."

"No EMDs?" the blonde inquired.

"We won't be there to take prisoners, Abby. We won't have time to neutralize harmlessly our enemies. As for the creatures… You saw the pictures, these creatures were tortured. Either they are likely to attack, or they are so close to death that killing them will stop their pain. I'm not that happy with that either, but we don't have a choice" Becker said firmly. "We'll also need pliers and crowbars. The usual set for anomaly alerts."

They went on about the mission, under the scrutinizing eye of Lester, who now found them more alive with only a few of hours sleep than they had been for the last three weeks.

Three weeks and a few days.

He prayed for Jess to be still alive.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: This is a chapter that I wrote once and then had it entirely rewritten. I hope it is better now and won't disappoint people.**

**It's far from being the end!**

* * *

Twenty-six nights. Six hundred and twenty-four hours. Thirty-seven thousand four hundred and forty minutes. Of that, she couldn't be so sure, having blacked out during most of her abduction.

But for the twenty-six nights, she was positive. Three weeks and five nights. Almost a month.

She still hadn't given up on escaping, despite her hawkeye jailers.

She had a free night last night. The creatures having to be tamed. They had lost a lot of it, she knew that. Ill-treatment didn't keep you alive. In a way, she was glad. That meant she hadn't killed them herself. Wherever they might be, it would always be better than the last months they had with Chris. She was praying for them to land in a better world. They hadn't deserved that.

She began to understand Abby and her arguments about the menagerie. If she got out of this place alive, she'd make sure to side with her in whatever battle she'd lead to preserve their lives.

_If_ she got out of there alive.

She was still feeding the hope that she'd escape one day, but hoping could only go on so much. This hope was going smaller and smaller with the nights spent in the arena.

To perfect her role as Gabrielle, Chris had given her saïs to fight. Oddly enough, once he had shown them to her, she thought more about Elektra (she blamed her "Marvel" phase). Still, she wouldn't fight with them. Chris couldn't force her to. She wanted to hurt as much as the creatures she had in front of her, and that meant fighting bare hands. During a fight, the saïs were strapped to her back, always. But she wouldn't use them.

She had tried once, but not to fight against the creatures. Her keepers had forgotten to take them back. She attempted then to remove her shocking bracelet, catalyst of her fighting behavior. Obviously, she was under strict surveillance: as soon as she had put the blade between her arm and the device, she had been violently shocked and the weapons had been taken back. She still had the wound made by the blade.

"Ga-bri-el-la! Sei bellissima stasera! Hai un secreto per sembrare tanto giovane?"*

Chris came once again checking on her before her fight, as usual.

"Dis-moi, est-c'que tu vas enfin te décider à aller te battre de toi-même? Ou est-c'que je vais devoir encore devoir sévir? Hein?"*

Wow. Italian _and_ French. In less than two minutes. That must be a record.

"Gaby, Gaby, Gaby, cat's got your tongue?"

He looked at her, as if checking the goods, then exited the cell, with a sign to one of her keepers she had learnt to know as "give her a shot".

And so he did.

She was then led in the arena. Cheers from everyone. That, she had the habit. The state of the cell was becoming worse and worse, they didn't bother to remove the dead warriors' corpses anymore. New blood was accumulating with the one that poured out the bodies of the contestants during previous fights.

The door on her left opened.

And she stopped breathing.

There, instead of the one creature she was used to facing, stood three creatures. _Three_.

No. That wasn't supposed to be like this. It never had. Why now?

She could make out a Minmi, but had no idea about the other two. She wasn't the creature specialist anyway. One looked a lot like the idea she had of a T-Rex, reduced to human size. She could already catch a glimpse of meat pieces between its teeth.

_"Meat or human flesh?"_

The last one, also human sized, although way taller than her, looked a lot like the second one in the structure, but thinner.

All sported taser marks and deep cuts. She had no doubt that, maybe not the Minmi, but the others would jump on her as soon as they would be given the go.

"Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce you to the _clou de la soirée_* ? On a side, you have the last three dragons you will ever meet! Though they do not spit flames, they are still as dangerous as the ones described during King Arthur's era! I can still remember the sounds made by the last warrior who met the big one, whose members were being ripped apart by its powerful jaws! I think his screams of agony echoed until five minutes after his death! These dragons are the pride of this entertainment, representing its spirit, _Draig Cryf_!

"But pay attention to the other side! Here stands our most powerful warrior, my lovely Gabrielle! Undefeated so far, her rage and fighting spirit make the whole arena trembling in front of so much power! You'll find yourself wanting to get some of her strength as it will overwhelm you! Her grace and fluid moves will enchant you! She is the one bringing utmost beauty to this battle, dignified and proud!

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is the first and only time you'll be able to witness such a _spectacle_. One aristocratic combatant against three of the most dangerous creatures on Earth! A warrior princess against her most powerful foes. Who will win?

"Mesdames et messieurs, que le spectacle commence!"*

Jess realized she couldn't stand a chance.

Feeling the battle lost before it even began, she prepared herself to fight.

* * *

They arrived at the arena without any problem, and parked their cars so that they could not be seen. They made two teams, one going to the front and one to the back.

Connor having been able to get them tickets, they decided to melt Abby and him to the crowd.

Progressing from the back, Matt and Becker found the cells in which Jess was held captive.

"Found cells in here. No blood. Seems like humans live here" Matt reported.

"We are moving through the crowd, towards the main entertainment" Abby replied. "The crowd's getting thicker. Doesn't seem like an arena, more like a snob reunion. Very weird."

"We're going forward" Matt stated back.

He and Becker and he proceeded with caution, stopping every now and then to check about any security staff.

"It kinda strange there's no one in here, isn't it?"

"Not if all the prisoners are in the arena itself" Becker replied. "There's nothing to guard here. The door was pretty difficult to open. They must feel guarded enough."

They passed the room Chris showed Jess on her first day, where were supposed to be all the participants.

"Becker!" Matt shout-whispered.

Both discreetly peeped into the room. They cringed seeing the state of its occupants.

"We have to find Jess. Now!"

Matt nodded.

They made their way to the source of big noise and soon, both teams found themselves on opposite parts of the arena. They couldn't help but stare at what was below.

"… Here stands our most powerful warrior, my lovely Gabrielle!…"

Wait, what? _Gabrielle_? Not _Jess_?

Becker watched carefully the scene below him.

There she was. Thinner, disheveled and mudder, but alive, alive and rebelling against those words pronounced about her. Becker could tell all about her stiffened posture.

But like the others, he could also see the three dangerous creatures around her, giving her no chance to get out of there alive.

The odds were against them.

"Jess…" Becker breathed.

* * *

**Translations :**

**1. "Gabrielle! You're beautiful tonight! Do you have a secret to look so young like that?"**

**2. "Tell me, are you gonna finally fight by yourself? Or am I gonna have to take action? Huh?" Actually, "sévir" is translated by "taking action" but it means more "punishing in a worse way than I am already", as, obviously, here, Chris takes already action.**

**3. "...the highlight of the night!..."**

**4. "Ladies and gentlemen, let the show begin!"**


	9. Chapter 9

The sound of Jess's name muttered by Becker was enough for all of them to spring into action.

While Abby and Connor sprinted toward the right level, Matt and Becker made diversion, causing havoc for everyone to flee. Confusion was everywhere. Becker was trying to get in sight the announcer, convinced he was the man they all were searching for so long.

When Abby finally managed to open the door of the arena, Chris shouted.

"Noooooo, Gabrielle!"

Giving another electric shock to Jess, he caused her to fight against the creatures, which were already terrorized by the noise everyone was making.

Jess had had just enough time to understand that finally, she had been found.

She focused more than ever on rejecting the drug effects in order to stop fighting, but in the meantime, one of the creatures had latched on her arm and was causing serious damage. She began to lose consciousness.

Connor shot the creature, causing it to let go of Jess's arm. In the meantime, Chris managed to flee. Becker and Matt rushed then to Jess's side before they heard a deafening explosion.

Chris had lost it. Rather than being defeated, he had preferred destroying the building, putting the whole thing into flames, erasing evidence, burning to ashes the building and all that was inside.

Jess was convulsing. The hold she had for a moment on the drug had had her weakened and helpless.

"We got to get out of here!" Matt shouted, seeing the flames dangerously approaching. "Abby and Connor, find a path! We'll follow you!"

Becker gathered Jess into his arms, holding her to him tightly to minimize the convulsions.

Efficiently, Abby and Connor found their way back to the front door, Matt following them closely to guide Becker. The door wouldn't budge.

A sudden rush of flames went down on them. Jess whimpered. Chris was behind them, a kind of aerosol in his hand, flaming everything and everyone. Fortunately, the whole audience had evacuated, leaving only the A.R.C. members and him.

"Vous ne m'enlèverez pas ma Gabrielle!"* he shouted, emphasizing on each word.

Becker, still holding Jess, couldn't do anything but let the others deal with him.

Chris was mad. He was really mad. Not only those bastards had ruined the party, had made everyone flee, but they were also kidnapping his Gabrielle? Who did they think they were?

Abby and Matt tried to seize him whereas Connor was trying to break down the door.

"Connor! Move!"

As he ducked, Connor saw Becker somehow retrieving his weapon and, despite the circumstances, firing five times on the weak spots of the door, enough to open it.

Everyone but Chris rushed out.

They ran to their cars, Becker holding protectively Jess who was still convulsing. They could hear Chris shouting like a madman in the arena. The guy stayed despite the flames. They couldn't bring themselves to care.

They sped up towards the A.R.C. shouting orders through their earphones for the medical team there, assessing Jess's condition. Matt was particularly glad the show had been so late, making the streets empty.

Lester saw them barging into the A.R.C. The medical team was on the ready and a stretcher was waiting for Jess.

The girl was a sore sight. Still clutched tightly to Becker's chest, she was trashing about, bleeding profusely. It seemed that no part of her had been spared.

Becker laid her down on the stretcher, and the medics made him let go of her while they were wheeling her away taking her vitals. As he tried to follow them, Matt stopped him, telling him the medical staff would be needing all the room to treat her efficiently.

Lester knew not to ask questions. He was dying to know what happened, and the reasons of Jess's poor state. But seeing them collapsing on the nearest thing that could hold them up, the adrenaline rush definitely gone, he could only notice the haggard stare they all had, their own state, covered in soot, with little cuts here and there. He retreated calmly to his office.

A dozen minutes later, a medic entered the room. All stood up, waiting for answers.

"We've given her diazepam despite her drugged state, but she's not convulsing anymore. The rest of the staff is treating her for her injuries. But now we have to treat you as well."

"We're fine" snapped Becker.

"Captain, while I'm sure you're in better state than your friend, all of you still need medical attention. You don't know what burnt down here. We'll have to treat your cuts and clean your lungs. You have to be under oxygen for at least a quarter of an hour. We'll run tests on whatever was in your lungs. And this is _not_ open to discussion" he added, seeing Connor opening his mouth.

Reluctantly, they all followed him to be treated.

From where there were, they could not see Jess, but could hear everything around her.

Frantic voices.

Beeping sounds.

While they were forced to leave her side, they could not help her either.

They felt useless.

After they'd been cleared off and all but ordered to take a shower, they all went to wait for the medics to tell them news about Jess. They were surprised to see Lester already waiting. It had been an hour since they came back.

After a few minutes of silence, Abby began.

"It was worse than we thought…"

She was then relayed by Connor and Matt, and all three reported to Lester what had happened. Not once he interrupted them. He could see the angst and the pain in their voices, in their eyes. Becker stayed silent.

"The most important thing now is that you got her back" Lester finally said once the report was over. "She's under the best of cares. Now all we have to do is waiting."

And waiting they did.

* * *

**Translation:**

**1. "You won't take my Gabrielle from me!"**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I'm certainly not a medic, so don't try to find some kind of realism in the symptoms and treatments mentioned below.**

**Good reading!**

* * *

Three hours after their barging in the A.R.C., one of the medics exited the O.R., exhausted.

"Physical damages were taken care of" she began, knowing any other form of introduction would be useless. "She had a nasty injury on her arm but surprisingly enough, she's got only small cuts here and there. She has broken ribs but it is recent, it will not be a problem to heal it. None of them had punctured her lungs fortunately. Her bracelet has been removed. Physically speaking, she'll recover."

"What do you mean, _'physically speaking'_?" worried Abby.

"The drug in her system took a toll on her. Not only she's highly addicted, but it damaged her liver too, and parts of her brain. She must have been having nose and ear bleeds there. That, coupled to the electric shocks she received from her bracelet, damaged her brain some more, and did badly to her heart. But the worse of it is her addiction. The safest route would have been reducing the doses little by little, but we have to consider the state of her organs. They won't be able to keep up with that drug anymore. For the moment being, we're trying something to block the withdrawal effects, but it won't last long."

"Can we see her?" Abby asked.

"One person, and not for long. She's asleep for the moment, but when she wakes up, she'll be in a lot of pain. We can't give her anything. We'll have to assess the damages done to her brain too."

Matt put his hand on Becker's shoulder.

"Go. Give her our best wishes."

Becker nodded and entered the room.

There she laid, surrounded by dozens of machines. Lifeless. He approached her and sat, taking her uninjured hand in his.

"You would have hated it. There's no color here" he chuckled.

He squeezed her hand.

"You have to get better, Jess. The A.R.C.'s a mess without you. Matt is more serious than usual, and Abby and Connor don't have silly fights anymore. We can't laugh at them. Plus, Connor took over your ADD, and I bet there's junk food everywhere. You got to wake up to give him a tongue lashing about it. And Lester seems…compassionate? See, the world isn't right if you don't fix it!

"We did not come and save you for you to die here, Jess. We have to have your little bouncing girl back, all smiles and colors.

"But I swear, hun, once you wake up, you'll have one of those little black boxes glued to you. I'm wondering if I can't ask one of those surgeons to put it under your skin, so that you won't go wandering on your own once again. We'll be always able to track you. And someone will be calling you every minute…ok, makes that every quarter of an hour, to know what you're up to. I swear I'll do it if I have to. We'll know every second of every day where you are. You won't be in danger again."

His voice broke.

"Get better Jess…"

* * *

A few hours later, Becker hadn't left her side yet. He felt movement on the bed.

"Jess?"

She moved a little, eyes closed.

"Can you hear me?"

She still wouldn't open her eyes, fearing that what she saw before being unconscious was only her imagination. That they shot her so much drug that she was dreaming of Becker's voice.

"Jess, you're back. You're back at the A.R.C. Matt, Connor, Abby and I went to get you back. You're safe now, you're safe…"

She opened her eyes then.

She was welcomed with a bright light that forced her to shut her lids instantly. Yup, no doubt here, she never had that kind of light _there_. She made another attempt, slowly. There. Her vision was a bit blurry, but she could make out where she was. Or rather, where she was not. She could see a figure hovering above her.

"B…Beck…"

"Shhh… Don't try to talk. I'll go call someone."

"No!" she tightened her hold, waking up completely. "Chris will-"

"Chris is not here anymore, hun. He's gone. For good" Becker soothed. "But you have to let me tell the doctors you're awake."

After pondering, Jess let slowly go of his hand.

"Be right back" he said while kissing her forehead.

Seconds later, he came back with a man and a woman who were assessing her state. She instantly tensed.

"Jess, they are your doctors. You're safe here. There's nothing to worry about" Becker said in an attempt to calm her down.

He had taken her hand back and running his thumb on it.

Her voice was scratchy, even after the glass of water provided by Becker. Not talking for weeks could explain that.

After a couple of questions, and a big headache, the doctors seemed dissatisfied.

"Are you aware you were drugged?"

"Yeah… I'm still feeling it-"

She put her hand to her mouth and Becker presented her a bucket. She threw up. Blood.

"Miss Parker, while we are quite content with the fact you apparently didn't sustain any brain damage, we must tell you that, in your state, you have two solutions. Either we continue giving you the drug, in smaller and smaller doses, but that means the damage already done to your organs will be worse; or we stop every drug altogether and-"

"Stop it. Definitely" she cut him.

"Miss Parker, you have to be aware of the risks. All patients having had this drug went under great withdrawal effects, and that killed them. Each and everyone of them. And they were taking it for far a shorter time you have been. The seizure you had on arrival proves it. If you take that path, it will be violent and extremely painful, you won't be able to go back."

"I cannot take this thing anymore."

"We just want you to be aware of the facts before we take action. It is possible you will be restrained physically in order not to hurt yourself."

"I understand."

"I'm asking you for the last time. Despite all the effects described earlier, are you sure you want to stop taking it at all?"

"I am."

She was shaking by then.

"Alright then. We will not give you anything from now on. You'll have to be monitored twenty-four/seven. If you're up to it, before what we gave you lost its effect, do you want to see your friends?"

Her face lit.

"That's an answer then. I'll send them to you."

He exited the room. She turned to Becker who hadn't said anything. She shook a bit more.

"Hey, hey, there, hey, that's alright" he tightened his hold on her hand. "I'm here. You'll pull through this, you're strong. You would never have been able to last this long otherwise. I trust you." He kissed her hand. "I won't leave your side. You'll be okay. You _have to_ be okay. Alright?"

"Alright" she nodded, still unsure.

The door opened, revealing Abby, Connor and Matt behind her. They all seemed hesitant upon entering the room.

"It's been too long…"

Those simple words from Jess had them running to her side

"Oh God Jess, we thought we lost you!"

Other exclamations came from all sides. They were all so happy to see each others, somehow aware that it could have been way worse.

They began conversing about her recovery, how they missed her and how they were happy she was back.

Jess was having trouble staying awake. Matt noticed it.

"Come on guys, we have to go know. Looks like Sleeping Beauty is about to go back to-"

"Don't call me that" Jess cut Matt, rather harshly. "Ever."

Surprised at her reaction, all stayed silent.

"I'm sorry, it's just that… It was one of the names he… Among other things…"

"We heard. 'Gabrielle'."

She shuddered.

"That guy had a bad fetish with Xena's girl. I just don't-"

"We understand. Sorry to have said that" Matt apologized.

"You couldn't have known."

"Now we do. We'll let you be for tonight. Becker?"

Becker shook his head.

"I'm staying for a bit longer."

"Suit yourself" he shrugged. "Take care, Jess."

Abby and Connor echoed.

Once alone, Jess asked.

"Why didn't you go with them?"

"Do you want me to?"

She protested weakly.

"No! No, of course not but, it must have been a hard day and-"

"Jess. I told you I would be here. So as long as you want me, I'll stay by your side."

Her speech was heavy with sleep.

"But-"

"No buts, hun. Now sleep."

"Goodnight Becker…"

"Goodnight, Jess."


	11. Chapter 11

The first night was okay. The first morning too. Matt and the others brought her many little colorful balloons, with "get well soon" cards. They wanted to make her stern room as lively as possible. She loved it. Even Lester came to pay a visit, seeming less uptight than usual.

At the beginning of the afternoon, hell broke loose.

Becker had been observing her the whole morning, saying nothing, watching her get gradually tense, as if she was fighting something.

_"Withdrawal."_

But Jess being Jess, she didn't want anyone to know about this.

Everyone gone, she began to shake and sweat profusely.

"I'll call a doctor."

"No!" she stopped him. "They cannot do a thing, remember… They can't…"

She didn't continue, her head rolling on the side and her eyes closing.

"Jess? Jess, wake up. Jess!"

Becker rushed outside to call for a medic. She took her vitals.

"We gotta wake her up. If she stays that way, she'll slip into coma."

She tried many procedures to get her to open her eyes to not avail. Becker shook Jess gently.

"Jess. You have to listen to me, wake up. Come on, hun, please, wake up now!"

No response.

Two other medics assessed her state and, after a long argument, injected her something.

"We have no choice, it is vital she wakes up. But it will be harder for her later."

Jess opened her eyes. And she felt like she was in fire.

Her head was pounding, her arms were stung with millions of needles, her stomach ached, a heavy weight was forbidding her to breathe, she couldn't see anything.

She screamed.

She was having convulsions and couldn't help it, she ached all over. She was barely aware of someone talking to her, all the while restraining her.

On the outside, Jess's reaction sent them into panic. Medics rushed to check her vitals, and tried to restrain her with cuffs on the bed. But she was trashing about so much they couldn't get a hold of her. She was hurting herself. She pulled her I.V. out, making blood pouring out. Her wounds opened. Sedatives being prohibited, they fought to calm her down.

Becker intervened and managed to grab all of Jess in one move, crushing her to him. Even though the convulsions persisted, she could not hurt herself anymore. He put her chin on her chest and made her curl up in fœtal position against him. He held his breath. He was fighting against her, and she was strong. Very strong. But he didn't let go of her. Some of the medics were gone finding more restrains for her.

A few minutes later, the convulsions receded. Becker still held her to him. He began rocking her gently, loosening his hold not to bruise her. Well, seeing how he had held her a few minutes before, she was bound to have some bruises anyway. She was opening her eyes slowly, letting herself being cradled.

"It hurts inside" she slurred.

The pain hadn't faded away. She was still feeling it, plain as day. But at least the seizure was over now.

Doctors reentered the room.

"Captain, can we ask you to…"

One pointed the bed. Becker looked at Jess who nodded. He then laid her down gently on it while the medics were restraining her.

"You will be having other seizures. This is the safest way to prevent you from hurting yourself" explained one of them.

She said nothing.

"Alright, now, Miss Parker, we don't have good news for you. After that little episode of yours, I must inform you that we cannot let you sleep anymore. I know you're already tired with everything you've been through so far, but close your eyes now and I'm not sure we'll be able to wake you up from the coma that would undoubtedly follow."

Jess looked at Becker, afraid. He took her hand, his eyes never straying from the doctor.

"We have to exhaust you, to exhaust your brain. Think of it as a reboot to work with a healthy system. There's no another way round. You will have seizures. You will feel pain. I cannot tell you I understand the pain you will be in because it will be insufferable. I know I'm asking much. But I trust that, having faced what you have so far, you'll be able to pull through."

After a moment of silence, the patient asked:

"We're talking about how long exactly?"

"Forty hours at least."

Jess tightened her grip on Becker.

"We'll have to assess at the end of this these forty hours if the effects are still here or if you can sleep again. Of course, we'll assign you someone to-"

"No need, I'll do it" Becker intervened.

"Sir, you have to understand-"

"Look, with all due respect, you said it yourself: you can't do anything else for her right now. She'll need a familiar face with her to pull through. I doubt any of your medical staff would be able to do much here."

"Sir, she'll have to stay strictly awake. You won't be able to let your guard down or it'll be way more painful for her. And that's _forty_ _hours_. Considering both of your states, it will be very difficult."

"If she has to, I'll stay awake too. I can handle it. To put you mind at ease, you can make rounds to make sure nobody's asleep, but I'm staying here."

The doctor pondered a moment.

"Fine. It's settled then. I'll go warn your boss about this…condition. But if you fall asleep if only once, you'll have to accept and let us watch over her."

Becker nodded.

"We'll bring you some food, now she just had a seizure, she probably won't have one for long."

They let the coworkers alone.

"Becker-"

"I'm staying. If medics didn't deter me, you surely won't be able to either."

"You stayed awake way before I woke up."

"And you've had rougher days than mine for more than three weeks. This is not a competition. I'll live. And I need you to too."

"You won't be convinced otherwise, will you?"

All she got as answer was a smirk.

A nurse brought them food. Jess showed her her restraints.

"Ah, I'm sorry Miss but I cannot free you. Even if the possibility of having a seizure right now is rather small, we can't take that risk."

"How am I supposed to eat then?"

The nurse looked pointedly at Becker, smiled at Jess, and walked away.

"Becker, you will not humpfr-"

Becker had already stuffed her mouth with the food. She chewed and swallowed. She looked at Becker who was grinning.

"You're proud of yourself?"

"Very."

Before she could start a fight, another medic came in.

"Sir, your boss knows now about the situation." Becker nodded. "Miss, I took the liberty to ask your friends to remain away during the next two days. I hope that's okay with you."

"I wouldn't have wanted to see me like that either. Thanks" she sobered up.

The doc nodded and left.

Food eased her stomachache a bit, but the pounding in her head was going worse and worse, breathing was still difficult.

"Becker?"

"Hum?"

"You…You're going to stay by my side?" she inquired, almost afraid he would disappear.

"Every minute of every hour until you get full recovery. Or until you're sick with me" he added with a grin.

"It will… get worse, won't it?"

Becker sighed.

"You're going to be okay, Jess. I promise."

Both dreaded the next forty hours.


	12. Chapter 12

**AN : As told before, I know nothing about medicine, I searched about the effects of withdrawal and hope not to have overdone it.**

**If I did, let's say this drug is so powerful it has weird effects, 'kay?**

* * *

The morning came with another seizure. Though violent, Becker kept her hand in his, hoping to diffuse some calmness through her. He couldn't do anything but watch her trashing about and screaming. He ached for her.

Ten minutes later, after ups and downs in intensity, it was over. They were brought food, but Jess wouldn't eat any of it, exhausted.

"Jess, you don't know when will come the next one. You have to eat food now to have the slightest hope to keep it down" Becker tried to reason her.

She refused stubbornly, feeling too weak.

"Don't make me force-feed you."

Reluctantly, she let Becker feed her gently. Her throat was burning.

Thirty-five hours to go.

* * *

She was trashing about again. But this was not a seizure.

It didn't make any sense.

A moment she was with Becker. The next she was only seeing _him_.

She tried to escape. He wouldn't let her go. He never had. She begged.

"Извинете! Извинете!"

She begged mercy for something she had not done.

He didn't care. She saw his hand crashing on her cheek. Then a blow to her already broken ribs. She couldn't breathe anymore.

"Извинете!"

She had to respect him. Because he had been _"so kind to put up with her and her problems so far"._ Because he only wanted _"what was best for her"_. He didn't _"want her to have misconceptions about her place"_.

He was worse than Chris. Worse than what she endured in the arena. She had trusted _him_. She had never trusted Chris.

Another blow to her arm. It was probably broken by now. He was restraining her. He was mad. She couldn't bring herself to remember why. It could have been anything. She long stopped trying to find the reasons why he was angry at her.

She felt his hand on her wrist, then taking her hand. Gently. No, it could not be _him_. _He_ wasn't gentle. She was always at fault, she always deserved a punishment. She always made mistakes. She never learnt. So _he_ had to teach her. Over and over again. Violence was the only way.

But the hand, the hand was gripping hers tenderly. She could feel a light brush on her knuckles. It could not be _him_.

She calmed down gradually and opened her eyes.

* * *

Becker was watching her opening her eyes. He felt relieved.

They had been talking about little nothings when she had suddenly begun to trash about. It had not been a seizure, he knew them by now. She had been showing all signs of delirium.

Her eyes had been shut tightly, an expression of pain and fear distorting her face.

Then she had shouted. Something like "yzvynateh" or "ysvynehteh". He couldn't really make it out. Seemed Russian, or one of those languages. A beg.

He had tried to restrain her more than what her actual restrains were. She had whimpered in fear. Had screamed that same word.

Becker had panicked. Hadn't known what to do.

He had taken her wrist first, then her hand. Had held it as lightly as he could. Had run a thumb on it, watching her face frowning in puzzlement, then calming down.

You didn't need to be psychologist to understand what had just happened.

When she finally recognized him, Becker could only wish he never found the guy who had caused her to behave like that. The things he would do to him otherwise would undoubtedly have him sentenced to death in many countries.

* * *

The seizures were becoming rarer and rarer. But the ache was on the contrary increasing. She couldn't think of any part of her that wasn't in pain.

Her mind was foggy. She couldn't think properly.

The doctors had agreed to free her from her restraints, Becker being able to restrain her himself in case of another seizure coming. She could lie on her side.

They weren't saying anything. Jess was facing Becker who was running a hand in her hair, with the occasional kiss on her temple.

"Hun, open your eyes" he said softly.

She was exhausted. He was not better. There had already been fifteen hours. Hardly a work day when you're working for the A.R.C. But both had their initial condition so bad they were not in shape to face it easily. It _was_ hard, the medic had been right.

But no matter what, Becker wouldn't fail his mission. They would face it together.

* * *

Five hours later, the medium mark.

Jess was not moving anymore. Becker could only be sure she was awake seeing her eyes closing every now and then. He wasn't letting her.

She was whimpering from time to time, the pain forbidding her to utter actual sentences.

Becker was feeding her stewed fruit, she couldn't bring herself to chew. She couldn't eat warm dishes either, they were burning her throat. She accepted melted ice cream from time to time.

He was constantly running a hand through her hair and a thumb on her hand in a soothing manner. He fought to stay awake. He didn't want anyone taking his spot because they thought he could not be up to take care of her.

The door opened.

"Any change?" Matt asked.

Jess didn't even lift her head.

"Not for now. Twenty hours to go still."

Matt sighed.

"Go. I'll take over."

"No. I can-"

"Becker. You're exhausted. The docs told me about what you're trying to do. You'll fall asleep. Go take a shower, a coffee. Anything to keep you awake. I promise you'll be back to watching over her right after. That's why _I_'m here and not a medic. I promise."

Becker pondered over it a moment, his movements never stalling.

He had to admit, he could not do it. He was feeling it. He needed something fresh, and now. He could be of no help to Jess if he were to let her sleep now because he fell asleep himself.

"Alright."

He stood up. Jess groaned. She didn't want him to go.

"I'll be back in no time, hun, I promise. In no time" he whispered in her ear.

He kissed her forehead and walked away.

He found Abby right in front of the showers. She handed him a fresh set of clothes.

"I thought you might need it."

He nodded a thanks before making his way to the showers. He let the water running as cold as he could bear, feeling the liquid waking him up in ways no shot of anything could.

He exited the showers and was welcomed with Abby and Connor handing him a big mug of coffee.

"Very strong. Beware. Connor made it."

Becker offered a small smile then, thanking the couple and almost downing the beverage in one gulp.

"Good thing we brought the pitcher then, heh?" smiled Abby.

She refilled his mug which he emptied less hastily. He could see both were worried about Jess, but he didn't want to describe the state she was currently in.

He thanked both of them and went back to Jess's room.

Seeing him, Matt stood to let him take back his spot, his hands automatically returning to Jess's hand and hair. She sighed.

Matt was making his way to the door when Becker called him back.

"Thanks. I needed it."

"Anytime."

* * *

Keeping Jess awake was becoming more and more difficult. She wouldn't sit up as it ached too much, but lying down made her sleepy. The pain was unbearable. A dull pain remaining, never decreasing, but never increasing either. Everything was fuzzy.

The docs where checking on her more and more often, taking her vitals, noting things down, and going back.

Becker took Jess to place her on his lap, so that she was not lying, but she was not more in pain either.

He began talking about the A.R.C., funny stories and sad ones, about the field or about the time before her arrival. He described some of Connor's best blunders, Abby's fierceness toward her pets, Lester's games with politics. He talked also about Cutter and Danny, Sarah too, their team, their times together. He forced his voice to take different intonations to keep her awake. He sometimes stopped to rehydrate his throat, then went back to another story, his hands returning to their familiar spots.

He could not bear to see her like that. Jess was supposed to be lively, all colors and bounces, not whimpering in pain or fear, cradled in his arms. He _needed_ her to be bouncy, to talk without noticing what she was saying, then stopping and blushing realizing what she had been talking about might not be appropriate of her. Or when he was close. He loved approaching her without her noticing to make her jump and blush. It was so easy.

Now, the only blush she had was due to the mild fever she started developing a few hours before. The medics said it was to be expected. From time to time, he was running a cold cloth on her forehead to prevent it from rising. And resumed telling her stories.

* * *

A doctor and a nurse came in the room.

"We'll be making tests and analysis now, to attest her condition" the doctor explained. "Once the results coming back, we'll be able to tell you if she can go to sleep or not."

Becker nodded.

Jess was barely aware that something was stinging her arm, but exhaustion had overcome pain a little ago. She couldn't feel anything anymore. She wanted to sleep. Badly.

She vaguely considered Becker a bully. True to his word, he had prevented her from falling asleep this whole time. Even if she really wanted to.

She had soon found soothing his movements, making the pain a bit more bearable, wanting nothing more than to fell asleep like that, whatever he thought about it.

Becker resumed his tales, even if we couldn't make out the words he was uttering. She clung to the sounds to stay awake.

She wouldn't be able to last much longer.


	13. Chapter 13

This time, three doctors entered the room. Becker considered briefly shaking Jess into a more conscious state, but thought against it. There was no way she could understand what was about to be said.

"It seems that the drug effects on Miss Parker are no more" the younger began. "The addiction is gone and no further damage had been noticed. Moreover-"

"Does that mean she can sleep now?" cut Becker, straight to the point.

"Yes of course, but-"

"Is something else endangering her life right now?" he insisted.

"Not that we know of but-"

"But nothing. If nothing's endangering her health for now, everything can wait for tomorrow."

Understanding his way of thinking, the doctors took leave.

Jess felt she was moving. On the bed. Wait, he made her lie. No, she wouldn't be able not to fall asleep then!

Sensing her struggle, Becker approached her ear.

"You can go to sleep now, it's over. A good night sleep will do wonders."

She obviously understood him as she didn't struggle anymore. However, she was clutching his T-shirt with no apparent will to let go.

"You'll have to let go of me if you want to sleep."

"Ste…"

Oh. She wanted him to stay.

Too exhausted to think otherwise, Becker gently scooted her over, climbed in the bed and put her on his chest, mindful of her injuries.

They could finally fall asleep without any fear.

* * *

When he woke up, Becker found Jess in the exact position he had put her. She was struggling a bit to breathe, nothing abnormal considering her injuries.

A glance to his watch told him they had been sleeping for more than seventeen hours now. He could not remember very well the exact time they slipped into the arms of Morpheus.

Not wanting to move and wake her, he remained motionless, watching her chest moving up and down as she was breathing.

He could not help but think about the fight she had been about to face. Had they been a few hours late, or even a few minutes, he was not sure she could have been sleeping on him as she was now.

To think all it took was a freaking comic.

_"A manga!"_ Becker could already see Connor correct.

He could not understand the guy. "Chris", "Sousuke", "Vince" or whatever name he wanted to take. Analyzing his reaction upon seeing them getting Jess back, he was obviously fond of her. More than that even. Sure, capturing her and making her fight were not of the best treatments but he could see it in his eyes. When he called her _"Gabrielle"_.

And why "Gabrielle" in the first place? Jess had vaguely mentioned something about Xena. Ah yeah. This woman fighter. "Gabrielle" was obviously something belonging to that universe. Remembering how Jess was dressed, he supposed she was a warrior too. Was that guy so messed up he totally took Jess for this fictional heroine?

In his head, Becker couldn't see Jess as a warrior. She was not of the fighting kind. Physically that is. But he wasn't seeing her as weak either. On the contrary. He knew that, being on the field, he had to deal with all of those creatures without really thinking about anything else, apart from keeping his guys and civilians safe. Jess, she had to do everything. She had to deal with the teams, the creatures, the services (police, ambulances…), CCTV, and so on. She had to find out without a beat the best option for them, and for the world around them. She had to push away her fear when she was watching them approaching danger, her being so far at the A.R.C. He knew that kind of job could be pretty frightening. She basically had their lives between her hands. And that was a pressure she was dealing with quite well. More than quite well actually.

But she obviously had a strong physical side. He doubted she had been made fight little things compared to what they had seen. He had seen her injuries. He could still see them. She had been fighting, fighting for her life.

No, Jessica Parker was definitely not weak.

Putting up with that guy taking her for someone else. For something else. A poor excuse of a fantasy he made her personify. This fantasy that guy loved.

Then why had he made her fight that last battle? Obviously, she would never have been able to win that one. Had he been so convinced she was this "Gabrielle" that he thought she would be able to kill them all? Or had he wanted to kill her, warned by a sixth sense that that night would be the last one he would see her? Becker didn't know.

On second thoughts, he didn't_ want_ to know.

Seeing her with him, alive, maybe not safe from the possible damages done to her body and to her mind, Becker realized it didn't matter.

He allowed himself to relax, and slipped off to sleep again.

* * *

Next time he woke up, it was because of sound in her room. A nurse was checking her vitals.

Noticing him awake, she asked him to wake his _protégée_ so that the doctors could assess as soon as possible the damage done to her.

He gently ran a hand through her hair.

"Jess, wake up sleepyhead."

She groaned.

"Come on, hun, you wouldn't want the docs to see you that way, now do you?"

She muttered a thing that could pass for a "don't care".

He shifted his hold so that she was fully resting on the bed.

"Now would be a good time as any to open your eyes, hun."

She reluctantly obeyed, while he climbed off the bed and sat in the chair, their hands automatically connecting.

"You have something… on your chest" she slurred, her voice heavy with sleep.

Becker put his hand to his chest and felt the ring. He pulled it out.

"Oh. Yeah. We found it while searching the…"

He couldn't finish, remembering painfully the angst that caused its discovery.

"Oh. I see. Thanks for keeping it."

"I thought you might want it back later" he explained, about to remove the pendant.

"No. Keep it. I don't know how much time I'll have to stay here, I'd rather it was somewhere safe."

He simply nodded while putting it back under his T-shirt.

Two doctors came in, all business.

"Miss Parker, we're relieved to see you better" the man began.

"Now if you're up to it, we'll be making the final tests to assess definitively the damages, it won't take long" the woman explained. "But to do so you'll have to be alone" she continued, turning to Becker.

His grip on Jess's hand tightened.

"I'm not going-"

"Becker, it's fine" the younger woman tempered. "The sooner they do it, the sooner I'm outta here."

He gave her a look for her to confirm.

"I'll be fine. Now go. You'll tell me the gossips later" she joked.

"As if" he countered, but let go of her hand and kissed her forehead.

"We'll warn you as soon as we finish" said the woman.

Becker nodded and, after a last look at Jess, left.


	14. Chapter 14

He walked to the main building of the A.R.C., where everyone was already working. Abby spotted him, and elbowed Connor before making her way to the soldier.

"Jess?"

"She'll be fine. Went through hell and back, but she's with us now."

"Where is she now?" Connor inquired.

"Making tests. I'll tell you more after a cup of coffee. Grab Matt on the way."

They went to the break room, finding Matt along. Everyone having their drinks, silence settled in.

"So?" began Connor, not much for patience.

"She lasted the forty hours. Barely but she did. They ran some analysis and apparently the drug as no more effect on her. They gave her the go to sleep right after and she slept the day away."

"And you did too, obviously" added Matt.

"Wanted to check on her" Becker shrugged. "She just woke up. They're running final tests now, to _'assess definitely the damages'_. Because of the drug they couldn't really see the future ones. The whole check up. Wanted me away for a while." He finished his cup.

"And when will we be able to see her?" the blonde asked.

"No idea. Told me they would send someone to warn me."

A pause.

"Well, she's now with us, the drug hazard behind her. I doubt they will find anything worse now. We can consider her safe" claimed Matt.

No one answered.

Everyone was aware that the body might not be the only thing that would need healing.

* * *

Never trust a doctor when he says _"it won't take long"_. Jess's tests had been running for more than three hours already.

So far, her friends knew she had been through toxicology, MRI and X-rays. She was also taking various question tests to evaluate her brain.

What they did not know about was the psychological exam.

"Hello Miss Parker" a young woman, mid-twenties, casually dressed, greeted.

Jess stiffened. All about the woman's behavior was shouting out her profession, and if there was one medical discipline Jess hated the most, it was psychology.

In the past, she had already been forced to see one. _"That is my only condition to apply the sentence"_ had said the judge. He had wanted to be sure that she hadn't been making up her story, horror story she had had so much difficulty to narrate. So she had been to see one. Afraid of any of her words, any of her movements. She was persuaded that they were the kind of person to see many troubles with only one sneeze. She didn't trust them.

"My name's Sláine Kaducey, but you can call me Sláine" the doctor continued.

Jess noted then four things. One, this woman really thought the whole 'you can call me by my first name so that we'll be the best friends in the world' tactic actually worked. She probably thought that Jess would be asking her to do the same. No chance. Two, she purposely left out her title, probably not to scare her. Lost again. Three, her name was a concentrate of health. _Sl__á__ine Kaducey_. Health and its symbol. Sometimes, too much was really too much. Four, she _really_ did _not_ want to talk to her.

Jess said nothing.

The woman cleared her throat nervously.

"Well, you know probably who I am and what I'm doing here."

"I do, Doctor Kaducey."

The relief at Jess finally answering was replaced by a frown when she heard the appellation.

"What you've been through was rather… traumatic wasn't it?"

No answer. Way to state the obvious.

"Look, I know that the last thing you want is someone peering into your brain but you have to help me."

Ah. The classic 'I can't do anything if you don't help me' trick. To create a sensation of being in power in the patient.

"Jessic-"

"That's Miss Parker to you and no, it hasn't been traumatic. I've been abducted, fighting creatures and now I'm back. There's all that can be said about it. End of the story. Now if you'll excuse me, I'd like to see my friends."

"But-"

"I believe I asked you to leave, am I wrong?" Jess insisted.

"No but-"

"Then I don't see why you're still in my room."

Nodding, the woman turned on her heel and left, obviously about to cry.

_"Newbie."_

* * *

Outside, the Dr. Kaducey tried to compose herself. This Miss Parker was obviously stronger than she thought, and she wouldn't be able to crack her up. But it was also as obvious that she needed help. She was in denial. She was denying the effects of such an experience on her. Long term, it could lead her to serious problems.

She caught a glimpse of four people on her right, a bit fidgety. Probably the 'friends' Parker asked for. She made her way towards them.

"Are you here for Miss Parker?"

At the name, all looked up.

"We're waiting for the end of the tests. I'm Matt, and this is Abby, Connor, and Becker" Matt made the introductions.

"And I'm Sláine. Nice to meet you" they shook hands. "As far as I'm concerned, the tests are over for Miss Parker. She's asking for you."

At that, she could see the delighted look on their faces. This guy, Becker, was already moving towards the patient's room.

"Well, erm, we'll go and see her then" Matt finished, a bit embarrassed by Becker's behavior.

"I see, don't mind me. I'll probably see you later, considering, well, I work here."

"Yeah, probably."

Abby and Connor were squirmy.

"Well then, bye" the doctor announced, making her way towards the opposite direction.

"Bye" Matt replied, before all of them went to Jess's room.

* * *

OK. So Jess Parker was not one to crack up easily. But meeting her friends, Dr. Kaducey left with a weight less heavy on her shoulders. They obviously were concerned about the patient, and wouldn't fail to see if any problem arose. She doubted they would let the young woman do as she pleased, withdrawing, denying.

But even so, Parker had to receive professional help.

And despite Sláine's faith in her capacities, she was well aware that she didn't have what it took to.

It was time to call in the big guns.


	15. Chapter 15

She saw Becker entering her room, and plastered a smile on her face, trying to erase all traces of the earlier confrontation. She caught a glimpse of something passing thought Becker's eyes, but it was too fast for her to understand it. He sat on his chair, hand linking to hers.

Then the door burst open with three other people, a little bit less silent than the soldier. Their hands dropped apart. Abby hurried to hug Jess.

"Jess, it's so good to see you again! If the last weeks hadn't been a joy being the only girl with those guys, the last days were worse! I need my female buddy back ASAP!"

Jess laughed when Abby released her.

"I can imagine" she laughed.

Matt and Connor didn't seem to find it funny.

"So, when are you released?" Connor asked.

"Good thing of you to bring up the matter" replied a doctor that had entered the room without them noticing.

"While I must say we're quite content with the outcome of all of this, I must order bed rest for at least another three weeks for the injuries to heal. Then minimal exercise for the next three weeks, considering your ribs won't be fully healed after the first period."

"Three weeks?" Jess exclaimed.

"Three weeks indeed."

"But-"

"Bed rest and medication to lessen the pain, no stress, no physical exercise, well, I'm sure your colleagues know the drill" he looked pointedly at Becker and Matt, both having had their share of injuries.

Clearly, Abby and Connor were better skilled when it came not to be injured enough so that they had to see any doctor.

"But I can't miss ano-"

"Miss, I won't allow otherwise. You'll also have P.T. thrice a week at first, then twice and once for your arm. I'll let you know the schedule."

"So basically, you're telling me I cannot do a thing during three long weeks. And then practically nothing the next three ones."

"I never said that. You can watch T.V., read gossips…"

Jess groaned in frustration. All chuckled.

"Don't worry doc, we'll keep an eye on her" promised Abby.

"She won't have to move a muscle" added Connor.

"Don't encourage him" pleaded the patient.

"You heard the doc, Jess. I won't allow you in this building before six weeks" Matt declared.

"At least, counting from tomorrow. I still want to keep you in observation for one night, and then you'll be able to go home."

Jess sighed.

"It's not like I have a choice, is it?"

"Not really indeed. I'll need someone to get you back home tomorrow morning and I want you back in three weeks time."

"We'll get her home" Connor announced. "We live with her."

"Then it's settled. Try not to tire her. I'll see you for your release."

He let the five friends alone.

"Jess with bed rest for three weeks" stated Connor with a serious face. He looked at Abby and both burst in laughter.

"Erm, guys? What's so funny?" Matt was puzzled.

"Jess is not the kind you can make stay still in bed" explained Abby between two laughs. "It's like, impossible!"

"She wakes up at six am on Sundays, and that's only when she's tired!" added Connor.

"I just don't want to waste my day sleeping" pouted Jess.

Abby and Connor laughed even harder.

* * *

It had been five days since she had been released from the hospital, and Jess was bored out of her mind.

On the day of her release, the usual four were there, and Lester had joined them. For someone usually stoic, he had showed many emotions that day. Then he, Matt and Becker had gone back to work while Abby and Connor had helped her to the car, and then the apartment. They had filled her room with magazines, books and newspapers, and Connor had even given her a basket full of knitting supplies. _"To keep you entertained" _he had said. A wool ball had found its way to his face right after.

Two days later, a P.T. showed up to work on her arm. After a few minutes with him, Jess had found herself asking him whether he knew that human bodies were not made of porcelain. He had made her work more efficiently (and painfully) right after.

Abby and Connor weren't letting her going out from bed to cook or anything.

At least they were letting her go to the bathroom alone.

She was bored, bored, bored. Like really bored. Her next appointment with the P.T. would be the morrow only, and still at home. She couldn't wait for the seventh one that would take place at the hospital.

Making up her mind, Jess swung her legs on the floor, and stood with a wince. She made her way to her closet to find something which she could go out with. Satisfied, she dressed up, wrote a note to Abby and Connor telling them not to worry (she still hadn't had time to find a new phone), took a black box on a second thought (surprisingly enough, it was Matt who made her a lesson about having one, and she remembered Becker not looking at her at that time, tense with clenched fists) and exited the apartment.

Ah! The feeling of the sun and the wind on her skin. She had missed that a lot. She strolled to the nearest park, enjoying the scenery.

She had longed so much this little pleasure that she didn't see time flying.

Suddenly, she heard tires screeching, a car door being closed rather violently, and someone stomping in her direction. She looked up.

It was Becker. And he looked pissed.

"Can you explain me what the hell you're doing here and not at home?" he almost yelled.

She had never seen him like that. It scared her a little.

"I was enjoying some private time away from people preventing me from lifting my little finger" she tried to explained.

"What part of _'bed rest'_ don't you freaking understand!" he was now very close to shouting, but controlled himself, well aware of what the scene could look like to outsiders.

As she was not answering, he took a step towards her.

And she flinched. She actually _flinched_. Barely noticeable, but enough to him who was having his eyes trained on her. All of his anger evaporated.

When Abby and Connor had called him about Jess missing, he barely had the time to register their words about _"gone walking for a bit"_ that he had jumped on the nearest computer, found her location and speed-driven to her. He had been panicked, at first, that something had happened to her. He had then been angry at her for leaving like that, unaware of the danger outside and reckless about her health.

But now, having seen her _flinching_, he could not bring himself to be angry at her.

He was scaring her. That single thought alone made him ache.

"Jess" he said softly.

Understanding why his behavior had suddenly changed, she tried to compose herself and walked away.

"No wait!" he turned her around, making her look into his eyes.

"Jess, just listen to me. I don't know what happened to you, and if you don't want to talk about it, it's fine. But you should know, no, you _have to_ know, that I will never ever raise my hand on you. Never."

"I don't know what you're talk-"

"Hun, you can't hide a flinch like that from anyone, least of all from me. I'm sorry I kinda overreacted. I was scared for you. I mean, Abby and Connor were scared for you. I yelled. But I will never hit you" he repeated, trying to make her understand. His rage towards _this guy _that had made her scared of him grew ten folds.

"I know that, I wasn't believing that-"

"Let's get you back home" Becker gently interrupted, well aware she wouldn't want to admit that kind of weakness in front of him.

* * *

He dropped her at her apartment, Connor and Abby waiting anxiously for her.

"I'm sorry we called-"

"It's fine" she cut them. "I should have called you in the first place."

"How was he?" asked Abby. "Becker I mean. He seemed really…erm, nervous about it."

"Nervous is one way to put it" Jess muttered to herself. "He was fine" she added louder for Abby. "Just looking for me to give me a ride home. That's all."

Abby was obviously relieved.

"I'm really sorry guys, it's just that I couldn't take it anymore. It's not like I'll break or anything."

"Ah but we know that, little Jessie" Connor said affectionately while slinging an arm around her shoulders. "But we would be so lost without our little Jessie bouncing around!"

Jess looked at Abby.

"You're sure you can't have Rex back?" she asked."Because I think Connor is mistaking me with a dog…"

* * *

Jess was not sleeping well. Ever since her big nap with Becker after forty hours of awakeness. She supposed she had been so exhausted then to do otherwise.

She was always believing she would be woken up for another fight. She usually woke up in the middle of the night, feeling the need to be alert and in search for a way out. Then she remembered she was in her apartment and kept the noise down not to wake the couple not far from her. She was generally then noticing her scar on her left arm, reminiscent of her attempt to free herself from this nightmare. She was still, subconsciously, feeling the silver bracelet up her arm, ready to deliver another electric shock.

Having bed rest was great when you couldn't sleep the night. The fact that Abby and Connor were at the A.R.C. during the day helped her not to be discovered.

Abby and Connor who were bending over backwards to ease her life the most they could, always watching over her. She wanted them to resume their life as a couple, she was not a cripple.

She had _not_ been traumatized, she could go past it alone.

And she did _not_ get rid of all of her mangas little by little because they reminded her of Chris. Even if Connor has been proud to explain how he had actually found her. No. She just got rid of them because she knew them by heart by now and they were taking too much room.

She didn't need anyone to see. She was strong enough. She would handle it by herself, just like last time.


	16. Chapter 16

Abby and Connor rode with her to go back to the A.R.C. She was finally having her P.T. sessions at the medical wing there.

She had now P.T. for her arm and her leg, which was often twitching, causing her to stumble. That in itself was quite weird, considering she couldn't remember having any kind of bad injury there.

She entered the room, full of weights and other devices of torture (or so she thought).

A middle-aged man was preparing some kind of exercise in a corner, so she went up to him.

"Excuse me, I'm-"

"I know very well who you are and I also know how late you are" cut the man, clearly irritated.

Wow. That was a big change comparing to the other P.T.

"I'm sorry but-"

"I don't know why you're still just standing here and talking while I only ask you to be ready for P.T." he cut again, definitely angry. "So drag your pretty self over here, and begin the damn thing!"

That session was indeed torture. The guy just kept scolding her for a thing or another, pushing her to her limits with her leg. It was shaking uncontrollably now. When she was falling, he wasn't catching her, on the contrary preferring mocking her and forcefully bringing her back to the exercise.

She did not complain, it was not like she did not want to be back to her usual life as soon as possible.

The guy barely gave her a glance when he dismissed her, already going for another exercise himself. She was truly exhausted.

She changed and, checking her watch, decided to pay a visit to her office.

* * *

Everyone was busy when she entered the bullpen. It was nice seeing that nothing or almost nothing had changed.

"Jess!" came Matt's surprised voice behind her. "What're you doing here?"

"P.T." she answered after they had hugged.

At the mention of her name, Becker lifted his head and gave her a nod.

"Well, it's nice to see you again" Matt continued. "You need Abby or Connor?"

"Yes, one of them is to bring me back home at lunch break" she answered, a bit disappointed in Becker's reaction, or lack of.

"There're at the menagerie right now. I'll accompany you if you want."

Jess smiled brightly.

"With pleasure."

* * *

Her P.T. session had really messed up with her leg. She found it very hard to walk to the menagerie without wincing or stumbling. She did not want Matt to see it.

"Are you alright?"

So much for discretion.

"Yes, it'll pass" she dismissed.

"Do you want any help?"

"No!" she exclaimed. "I mean, no, I've got it" she added with a softer tone.

They soon arrived at the menagerie. Connor and Abby were arguing inside.

They knocked on the door to make their presence known and not to barge between two arguments.

"Hey Jess. How was P.T.?" Abby asked, cool as a cucumber despite the earlier fight.

_"Finally some silly fighting"_ thought Jess. _"Guess they're back to normal."_

"It was fine, nothing new" she lied. "Lots of exercises, you know."

"OK, I'll finish that report and give you a ride then. Unless Matt…?" Abby inquired, to see if he needed anything to be done before.

"Nah, it's okay for me, you can go" he shrugged.

"Thanks for accompanying me here" Jess thanked.

"It's fine. It was nice to see you again. Take care."

He let himself out.

"Well then miss, shall we go?" Abby offered an arm in mock gallantry.

"We shall, we shall" laughed Jess by taking her arm.

* * *

The ride home was quite silent, Connor having stayed at the A.R.C. for other reports.

"So, about earlier…"

"A silly fight, as your lot call it. I don't even remember what it was about!" shrugged Abby.

"Beh, not important. What is, is the make up tonight" smiled Jess.

"Connor was thinking about us going to the restaurant. Of course, you can c-"

"Abby! I told you I don't know how many times already that you two have to live your lives. I'll be fine. You need to go back to the 'Abby and Connor big match' so that we can bet on who'll win the next game" the FC said wickedly.

"Because you bet on us now?" exclaimed the blonde, in mock fury.

"Don't worry, I always bet you winner."

"You better."

Another silence.

"Abby, I'm sorry."

Quite puzzled, Abby waited for an explanation. Which was obviously not coming.

"Why?"

"I…Back there…Come on, where to begin" Jess was berating herself, not knowing exactly how to phrase it.

"The beginning would be great" smiled Abby, though a bit worried by Jess's behavior.

Jess sighed.

"Look, I know how you love those creatures, I really do. But back there, I… You saw it, I was fighting them. Somehow, most of the time, they were still alive after a fight but once…" she trailed off.

"So, basically, you're sorry you tried to save your life and you're worried I'm going to be mad at you because you killed one?" tried to clear the blonde.

"I'm… I'm practically responsible for the death of all of them, Abby! If I hadn't fought them, they still might have had the chance to survive!"

Abby was silent.

"I'm so sorry."

"Jess, there's nothing to be sorry about. Not only you fought them for your life, but you were forced to. I would say it was more because of the conditions of their captivity they are now dead than because of you fighting them. The only one I'm mad about is this sicko, about what he did to them, but most particularly what he did to you. I think it would have been a race between Becker and me to see who would kill him first, if he had survived. Don't beat yourself up over this. I'm not mad. If I were, I would be mad at Becker and Matt too, I don't remember how many of the creatures they have already killed, particularly Becker. I remember once I practically had to threaten him with a tranquilizer so that he wouldn't shoot at the creature! I think he ended up in strawberries that day."

"In… strawberries?"

"Yeah, well the creature, a Dracorex, had been hiding in a strawberry farm. The Dracorex ran towards him and Becker crashed through a stack of crates, full of strawberries."

They looked at each other.

And burst into laughs.

* * *

If she thought the first P.T. session was hard, she never saw the other ones coming.

She was not asking Abby nor Connor for a ride home anymore, not wanting them to see her right after a session. They assumed it was because, as she had mentioned before, she did want them to be back to their life pre-incident and not to look after her.

Her therapist was rude, and more. Almost waiting for her to misstep and then laugh at her. As if it was his greatest joy. Somehow, Jess began to doubt that guy was a certified therapist. No P.T. would be that sadistic.

He was draining her, day after day, waiting for her to ask for help, which she never did. Calling her weak, good-for-nothing, challenged. Jess was not sure she could go on any further.

Once, Becker had caught her right after one of those sessions, she being on the floor, unable to stand up, against the wall. He had tried to help her but she had swatted his help away.

"I'm fine" she had said. "A bit tired, that's all" a smile on her face.

He had then looked at her rather angrily.

"What?"

"Don't do that."

"Do what?" Jess had been puzzled, she hadn't thought she had done anything wrong.

"Plaster a smile on your face as if everything was perfect. Play as if nothing happened, or that you're strong enough to handle it all on your own."

"But-"

"Jess you've been doing that since the beginning!" he had all but exploded. "The only time you accepted help was during those forty hours from hell because you had no strength whatsoever to do otherwise. Ever since, you lie to everyone, saying everything's fine with a smile, thinking that by forgetting all of it, it would mean it had never happened. You're not facing your problems."

"Maybe because there isn't any! Have you thought about that? I have no problems! I'm at home, everything's being taken care of, there's nothing wrong! Why do you absolutely want to see a problem there?" Jess had been fed up.

She had taken support on the wall behind her and had stood with difficulty. Not wanting to look at Becker, she had made her way out the head high.

Becker had sighed and groaned in frustration before making his way back to his office.

None of them had seen that day the P.T. watching the whole scene.

He had dug into his pockets to find his phone and had dialed a familiar number.

"It's me. I may need more time. The case's worse than we thought."


	17. Chapter 17

Jess didn't know what to invent anymore. Abby and Connor were beginning to ask questions. Particularly about Becker who seemed not to be able to bear hearing her name anymore. Matt was surprised that, unlike the first time, she was not making a visit to their offices just to say 'hello'.

The pain in her leg was becoming harder and harder to hide too. Once or twice, one of her flatmates had made a comment about it, but had not pushed it.

They even caught up with her lack of sleep, but she dismissed them the best she could, knowing full well they were onto something.

She was running out of ideas.

And she was not forgetting her P.T. sessions with Dr. From Hell, who had a limitless joy to see her suffer.

No, really, Jess didn't know how to get out of her own mess.

* * *

Her coming back to work had finally been delayed, her P.T. declaring she had still a long way to go. Though she knew he was right, the feeling in her leg proving it, she was really angry at this decision. He hadn't even consulted her about this.

She couldn't comprehend the way her P.T. was working. Her therapist was rude and condescending with her, making her feel really like a weak dumb girl. Never a kind word, nor even neutral. He wasn't physically violent with her though, and that was where she was drawing the line. Though this therapy was supposed to heal her leg, she was feeling worse day after day. She couldn't understand it. Her P.T. hadn't asked her to go for another doctor's advice, and she would be the last one to ask for it.

So she sucked it up and went back to her exercises, wishing there was someone on Earth who could get her out of there in no time.

* * *

"I think there's something wrong with Jess."

Abby brought up the subject during lunch with the whole team. Becker didn't event lift his head.

"What makes you think so?" Matt asked. He hadn't seen Jess since her first P.T. session at the A.R.C., and she had seemed perfectly normal to him.

"It's like she's hiding something. If we walk to her unannounced, she reacts as if she had been caught red-handed. She refuses any kind of help and her sessions are drawing longer and longer" she explained.

"I found her on the floor once, and she told me she had dropped something, but it was on the table already" Connor added, equally worried.

"She doesn't want us to take her back home after her sessions, saying she doesn't want to bother us, but it's still weird" continued the former zoo-keeper.

Becker had had enough. He stood up to go back to his work when a gentle feminine voice behind him stopped him.

"Now that you are aware of it, you might be able to help her" Dr. Kaducey declared.

* * *

"You surely can't stand on your own legs you weakling!"

She had once again fallen flat on her face trying one of his exercises. As he was making no move to help her, as usual, she painfully tried to stand up on her own.

"You surely know where to put your efforts. _'Coral polish or pink one this morning'_?" he mocked her, clearly enjoying this.

She said nothing, she was kind of used to it by now.

"Want me to call your little friends for rescue?" sarcastically asked her torturer.

That did it. Jess bit hard on her lip not to cry. It had been days Connor and Abby finally left her alone, letting her take the matter into her own hands. But more than that, they began not to talk to her except when necessary. And it was not with the usual friendly words.

_"I'm being paranoid."_

Abby and Connor were probably fed up with all the times she dismissed their help. It was most likely nothing.

She had called Matt the day before, to know how things were running at the A.R.C., but she had found him quite cold, in a hurry to get rid of her.

_"Very paranoid."_

She tried a step forward, but fell down again.

"Good lords you can't really do anything by yourself! I've never seen such klutzy idiot before! It's like you enjoy being assisted, being so helpless, so useless! I can't understand why that guy wanted you to fight in the first place, seeing you can't obviously fend for yourself! You'd rather have your friends risking their lives to save yours!"

"Shut up!"

He stopped, bewildered.

"Shut up! You know nothing, you know absolutely nothing! You don't know how it was to be facing them, you don't know how it was to be facing him!" she shouted. "I could never sleep because he would jump on me to scare me, give me some of that shit that hurt me so much I couldn't breathe! He never called me by my name, I was trapped in that fantasy of his so much I was losing myself! I didn't know who I was anymore! He forced me to fight those creatures I didn't want to, he forced me to kill them, they'd done nothing wrong! I couldn't control myself, he hurt me so much I couldn't see what was wrong and what was right! I'm still expecting him to come and see me in the middle of my sleep to give me a shot I won't be able to get rid of! When we were trapped in the flames I was so angry, so angry at myself because I had been so stupid to get kidnapped and they had come to save me and they were risking their lives! Because of my own stupidity! If I had never worked here, none of this would've happened! I know that! I shouldn't be working here! I shouldn't be here! I shouldn't burden them with me! I'm worthless! I know that, and you, you know nothing, so shut up! Shut! Up!"

By then she was rocking herself in a ball, her hands on her ears, crying.

The P.T. let himself slide to a nearby chair, sighing.

"Finally…"

He picked up his cell and dialed up.

"It's me. Major damage here. She broke down. 'S not pretty. Might want to send me some help here."

He waited for Jess to calm down a little, so that she could at least hear him.

"If only you knew how hard it was to crack you up."

She looked up, eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

"Admitting that you need help after a trauma is not a weakness, quite the contrary. Playing mastermind so that your friends don't see the state you are in, that, that's stupid. Beyond stupid even."

She remained silent.

"Parker. You have a job with big responsibilities here. Lives are at stake. That's a lot of pressure. I suppose you don't want any of your friends to be injured or worse because you decided to break down right in the middle of a mission."

A pause.

"This thing with the abduction, as you clearly don't like it being called 'trauma', it's only part of the problem. You don't trust people enough to share your burden. Like the story with rijadko* Iliev."

"Don't even talk about-"

"It was not my intention. Though this is still a problem that will need to be attended to later, it is only part of the current one. You'll have to talk about it eventually, but it is not my place to make you do it now."

He let the idea sink.

"You can't make your life pushing everyone away from your problems. You're hurting them."

"How can I be hurting them when I make sure they don't know I have problems in the first place? These are _my_ problems. I and only I have to deal with them. I'm protecting my friends doing so" she rebelled.

"You're _protecting_ them? They've been dying this whole time to know what was the deal with you, they wanted to know what they could do to help, but you pushed them away! The one you hurt the most was probably that Becker guy, who saw through your game since the beginning! But he couldn't help you if you didn't let him in. They were all worried sick about you, feeling useless. Don't you see how you were hurting them?"

"But I told them I was fine!"

"Sweetheart, there are not so many lies that one person can hear without discovering the truth."

That made her think. The therapist saw Becker, Abby, Matt and Connor standing at the door, but he made a motion for them not to enter yet.

"What do you think about them?"

"Huh?"

"You're talking about leaving. About not wanting to be here in the first place."

"I never said that!"

"Then what did you say?"

"I…I… If I hadn't been here, they wouldn't have searched me because I was missing. They wouldn't have put their lives at risk because of my own stupidity. They wouldn't be hurt now. They-"

"You wouldn't have sent Becker on our trails when I asked Abby to go to the construction site and saved us all. You wouldn't have saved those two boys at the school" said Connor, taking upon him to disobey the therapist.

"And Becker" followed Abby. "We probably would be homeless or close to it. We would be hating the A.R.C. as no one in there seemed to pay the smallest attention to us."

"Connor and Abby would've died in this acid cave, and I would have been too late for Emily."

"And I would've died with Ethan's bomb" concluded Becker.

Jess did not know how to react.

Abby rushed to hug her tightly, to what Jess responded gratefully. Connor approached to pat her back. Matt and Becker remained standing, not really at ease with emotional gestures.

When Abby and Connor finally released her, Jess took a deep breath.

"I'm so sorry."

"Now's not the time to be sorry" countered her P.T. "Your past is something to be taken care of but your friends are not part of it. It's a defense mechanism you have to learn to drop down when your friends are willing to help. I don't suppose you would do psychotherapy, I've read the bit about the after-trial, with the judge's decision. Quite messy. But talking to someone you trust would be a good beginning. Trusting someone would be. But now there's nothing more I can do."

"What about my leg?"

"Psychosomatic. You had nothing with it to begin with. It was just a way for your body to tell you something was wrong. It'll pass in a few weeks, if not a few days."

He was about to leave the room.

"Wait! I don't even know your name!"

He stopped and smiled.

"I'm Dr. Breasal Kaducey"

"Kadu…"

"Yes, my daughter was having a hard time with you. She asked me for some help."

Jess couldn't believe it.

He winked and walked away.

**

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Translation:**

**1. Mister**


	18. Chapter 18

They decided to go to the nearest pub and relax. Jess even accepted Becker's help to compensate her leg. It was good, she found, to be helped.

They chatted about everything and nothing until Abby brought up what exactly they had all been avoiding those past weeks.

"What happened? You didn't trust us enough to tell us about what you were feeling?" she asked, feeling rejected.

"Abby I don't…do…feelings. I don't do bad feelings. I've been taught not to burden the others with my stories, to be strong-"

"You don't have to be strong all the-"

"I learnt that long ago, and old habits die hard, Becker. You're a bit like that too. You, and Matt, you don't talk much either."

"We've not experienced the same things you have in that cage. And when it's necessary, we do talk" countered Matt. "We don't talk about it with everyone, but we talk. And you, you thought you could hold all of that buried in yourself thinking everything would be okay. That's where you went wrong."

"We would have been glad to help" added Connor, feeling left out.

"I don't want to talk about it…"

"Don't do-"

"…now. That's too much, in too little time. I just can't… Listen, I promise I will talk. But there's been so much. I don't think I've finished sorting this out in my head yet. It'll take some time. I… I need to think about it on my own. For now. But not tonight" she finished in a stern voice.

No one knew what to answer to that. Connor took the matter in his own hands: he knocked over his glass, focusing everyone's attention on him.

"Connor!"

Exclamations went from all sides. Only Jess was smiling gratefully at Connor, knowing full well his purpose there.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" the young man apologized profusely, glad to have been of assistance to diffuse the situation.

After a few more exclamations from the others, and new drinks ordered, the table settled into an easy conversation, as if the earlier argument hadn't ever happened.

Everyone knew that things would take time. But the first step had already been taken. It was up to them to run things the way it would be better for everyone.

* * *

They spent most of the night there, enjoying their recovered friendship. They were talking about everything under the sun, and relished in each others' company.

But the strain of the last few days had taken a toll on them, Jess showing it the most, practically asleep on Becker's shoulder. He was trying not to shift too much, hoping that by the time they left, she would be out like a light. She could use some sleep anyway.

They finally called it a night, and by then Jess was totally dead to the world. Cautiously, Becker carried her to the car, following Abby and Connor in theirs. Matt bid them goodnight and drove back to Emily.

* * *

Finally arrived at their shared apartment, Abby and Connor led Becker to Jess's room, where he laid her down carefully, removing her shoes and putting the quilt over her. He stayed a few minutes, watching her, enjoying the quietness so rare those last days.

The noise of clinking ceramic stirred him out of his thoughts. He exited the room noiselessly and went back to Connor and Abby, who were settling cups.

"Tea?" asked Abby.

He smiled tiredly and nodded.

The three sat around the kitchen counter, drinking leisurely. Connor sighed.

"What a day…"

"Months, you mean!" countered Abby, cringing. "I can't even remember when this whole ordeal began…"

"Well, between Jess hiding, action man mopping-"

"And to say the whole of it happened under our nose without us noticing anything" the animal lover cut, trying to avoid a confrontation at the use of the old nickname.

"Méfiez-vous des appareeeences" the young scientist began to sing with a creepy voice.

"Connor, if you want to keep that Pocahontas DVD of yours, I strongly suggest you stop singing, now."

"It's not mine, it's Jess's" Connor tried to defend himself. "And that's not Pocahontas."

"Oh really? What is it then" the blonde asked cockily.

"Pocahontas _THE SECOND_, Journey to a New World. It's totally different."

Abby and Becker laughed at that.

"Somehow, I can easily picture you watching that kind of thing" Becker commented, then frowned. "Wait, you were talking French, right?"

"Yes, the whole purpose of watching it is for Jess to teach me." At that, Abby gave Connor a look. "Alright" he relented, "part of the purpose."

"I thought that guy-"

"Jess was teaching Connor way before the abduction. She has a gift with languages, not only programming ones, but spoken ones as well. Connor's been dying to know French for ages."

"And every Saturday, we had our little session. Watching movies and Jess teaching me some points after."

"Those are hardly movies Connor. They're called cartoons."

"_Dessins animés_, will you?"

"_'Had'_?" Becker intervened before Abby had time to retort.

The couple turned back to him.

"Truth is, ever since she came back, she hasn't touched any of the DVDs" Abby admitted.

"We used to throw some words here and there in conversations, for practice. After…you know what, I tried once and she gave me a look… I couldn't really understand it. It was a mix of fright, and anger I think. I never dared trying after. Nor asked for the teaching either. Probably should have pressed the matter further."

"And risking her to withdraw into herself completely? That would have been a bad move. The way she is… the way she thinks… She wouldn't have liked you showing there was a problem, she wanted to deal with this by herself. It would've shown her weakness. She would have hated it."

"You should know, heh?" Connor noted. "You both are working the same way. Same _'tough guys'_, same _'I don't need help from anyone'_, same_ 'I work well on my own'_…"

Becker looked down, aware that this was probably one of Connor's rare moments of wisdom. The boy was right on the whole thing.

"And that's why you knew before us, isn't it?" Abby pursued. "That's why you noticed everything before any of us, and tried to crack her up by yourself."

"I…I tried. I failed."

"God, what's with the both of you!" the blonde exclaimed. "We'll have to put you into counseling, seriously. Trust management. Who would've known?"

"We trust people, we just-"

"-don't trust them enough to rely on them?" she supplied.

His shoulders sagged. Defeated.

"Hey mate, don't worry" Connor slapped a hand on the soldier's shoulder. "With us by your side, you two won't ever run into this kind of trouble anymore!"

Becker looked pointedly at Connor's hand.

"Hand off?"

"Hand off."

**

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**

**The song sung by Connor is the French version (and not Canadian French, French French) version of "Things Are Not What They Appear" sung in "Pocahontas II" by Radcliff and his buffon, right before the bear thingy. I always loved this song but found it quite creepy at the same time. Of course, even if I have copies of the three of them (legal ones, mind you) in my MP3 player, I obviously don't own the rights of these songs.**

**OK, so this is nearly the end. One more chapter and this story finally ends.**


	19. Chapter 19

**AN: And that's the final chapter. Honestly, the hardest to write. I had the whole story written in two-three days, but this chapter took me more than a week. I really couldn't find a way to close the story, none that satisfied me anyway. I then thought that, considering that the whole story revolved around Jess's problems, it would be convenient to have her describing her side of the end.**

**Enjoy!

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**

_Dear Seasaidh,_

_Apparently, talking to yourself is not considered going mental. Well, according to two specialists I know. Anyway, now that I've written these few words, it's too late to back down._

_Drs. K. advised me (not that I'm into counseling or anything, I still don't trust people like them) to write down what I can't tell the others for now. Makes it real. Not denied. In a way, better for my sanity._

_I'm considering typing that stuff down and encrypt it at maximum level, but that's kinda a big risk. As everyone knows I'm a big fan of computers, the best for this not to be discovered (ever) is probably to write it down with a good ol' fountain pen (with erasable ink if need be) in a common copybook. "Always hide in plain sight what you do not want to be discovered" was always saying my mother._

_So. There. I'm writing stuff._

_I feel relatively silly to be writing to myself to tell the truth. Using a translation of my own name as a cover, so that if anyone comes upon this, he or she would have the decency not to read it, considering it's supposed to be a letter. And everyone knows not to read a letter that is destined to somebody else. Well, maybe except Connor._

_It's been four weeks since my… I don't really know how to describe it. I'm way too proud to call it a break down, but I suppose that's part of the process to acceptance. The others consented I do not talk about it right now, and for that I'm grateful. I hate to admit it, but Dr. K. Sr. opened my eyes that very day. I did not see how hurt they were because of my hiding everything. I thought it could have been best for them but I was wrong. Once again._

_I thought I would be able to handle the aftermaths of this incident, but obviously, I wasn't. I thought I could handle it as efficiently as I did with the first one but, turns out, I haven't dealt with the first one yet. I hid it. You know like, cleaning up your room and putting the dust under the carpet. The problem is that, when there's too much dust, you can see the bump on the carpet. People can see that bump. And they start to ask questions. So you try to press down the dust and, when it doesn't work, you buy a new carpet. A more concealing one._

_I guess the whole 'Draig Cryf' stuff really got to my head and I thought I was, myself, a 'Strong Dragon', fearless and invincible. Needing no one._

_It's not that I don't trust them, I really do. It's just that the last time I let myself close to someone, I paid it dearly, and almost didn't make it out alive. Someone I trusted with everything I had. Someone I was ready to die for._

_But that, I can't talk about it now. Neither can I write about it. Still too painful._

_Last night, we were talking with Abby and Connor, as usual, and I let some parts of the abduction slip into the conversation. They listened, but did not focus on it, and, somehow, that was what I wanted. I can't focus on it myself, but I found that talking about it casually, letting pieces of it slip into an everyday conversation, that, I can handle. And it relieves me. And I think, somehow, that it relieves them as well._

_They stopped watching over me like hawks. We're back to normal, with usual bantering and outsiders making bets and counting the scores. Abby's usually winning. I'm glad to find them back._

_Matt was walking on eggshells at first. Probably thought I would crack up again. He seems to understand now and doesn't bring up the matter. But I know he'll be here if I need him. He seems to have his fair share of secrets too. I hope he trusts Emily enough to confide in her. I now know what's like to keep everything to yourself, and it's not pretty when it becomes too much._

_Ever since I've been cleared off to work, Lester acts as if nothing had happened. I guess he trusts the others to make a move at the first sign of… well, 'untrustfulness' I guess. Fortunately, according to Dr. K. Sr.'s prediction, my leg healed by itself a few days after he said so. Wonders of the mind over the body._

_The hardest has been Becker. I hurt him the most. Ironical, huh? I don't want to be hurt so I end up hurting the ones closest to me. Because I can admit it: he is definitely the closest to me, able to pinpoint since the beginning what I was doing and trying to keep me from going on this way. But I didn't listen. With hindsight, now, I can see how often he was here, right next to me, during the hardest periods of this whole ordeal. And still, I refused to let him in. I feel so bad about it._

_We had a conversation. Yes, the "serious" kind. About trust. And relying on people. There was some yelling involved. Alright, there was a lot of yelling involved. But we needed that, I think. We needed to get the whole of it out of our chests. I finally had my 'do not wander off without anyone by your side' and 'never go away without a black box' tongue lashing. I remember Abby being surprised it had been Matt who gave it to me the first time. I now understand why. Oddly enough, I get the impression that Becker wouldn't be against a GPS implant for me, to keep me on a leash. But that's just an impression. I hope. I wouldn't let him anyway._

_As for trust and relying on people, I showed him I wasn't the only one in the lacking department. Sure, ever since we got Abby and Connor back, he's been less withdrawn but still, one cannot really say that Captain Becker is a model of trustfulness. He's got that huge superhero complex, soldier man convinced it is his duty to save the whole world. In a guiltily kinda way. It's the man who has already lost too many people close to him, and beats himself up pretty badly when another casualty occurs under his watch. The kind of guy who observes, but says little. I think the first time I saw him, I wanted to make mine the mission to bring him to trust again, at least himself. Guess I was seeing a bit too much of me in him, and wanted to make sure the kind of people we were were able to trust._

_We agreed we both had to work on it._

_For so long I have lived thinking Mark Twain was absolutely right. "Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it." Or even Plautus, with his "homo homini lupus". So long I have learnt not to trust easily._

_Not to trust at all._

_Overcoming that need not to trust anyone will be hard for both of us. Fortunately, we're not alone. To begin with, there are the both of us. And then, there's always the couple Abby/Connor, that sure as hell will never allow us to wallow in self-pity 'cause we can't trust people. And there's also the whole world around. Sure, we probably will have to keep it in the A.R.C., as I don't see how we can explain what we live to those who do not have clearance ("Hey, hi handsome! What I do for a living? Running after doors opened on versions of Earth several million years before and helping a team of soldiers chasing after the dinosaurs that go through it. When there is not a messed up woman trying to wipe out the human race. The usual. And you?". I totally can see that going), but that makes a pretty bunch of people still._

_He kept the ring. Asked for it. I can see it often, making a bump under his T-shirt. I think he's scared to find it again in the same circumstances. Keeping it with him will prevent that from happening. Maybe a bit superstitious, but if that puts him at ease…alright, I'll admit it, I kinda like the fact he's wearing permanently something that belongs to me. But tell no one, hush-hush._

_Recently, I bought back some of the mangas I owned before… before. And I remembered why I liked so much reading them. In each and every one of them, the hero is struggling to get what he wants, his ultimate goal. He never falters. He always stares right at his purpose in life, doing everything he can to reach it. My favorite remains Kiyo. I admire Azumi for putting up with him. This ex-coming sprinter boy, one hair from becoming national champion, forced to give up his dream because of his illness. This boy, becoming a young man, fighting against everyone to enter the national team of wheelchair basketball. He loses hope, from time to time. He's human. But then he resumes the fight, more fiercely than ever. I guess I like him because he's being this emotional retard, oblivious to the attention the others may pay to him. He just fights, refusing anyone's help. But learns the hard way he has to let people getting close to him to help him. He's learning that he cannot rush things, that he must take one day at a time in order to fulfill his dream._

_I'm taking a leaf out of his book, "carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero". I can't live fearing constantly about the future. And I can't bury my past either. It's part of who I am today. I have scars. Physically and mentally. The physical ones are here to remind me of the mental ones. But I am the one who chooses an interpretation to them. I now see my scarred arm as a token of my will, down there, not to lose hope, to fight until I was free again, and not as a way to torture me more than I had already been._

_Edward Gibbon had said "I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience. I know no way of judging the future but by the past". I have to be reminded that experiences are what build us. Without experience, I would never have been able to enter the A.R.C. Without experience, I would never be able to do my job as efficiently as I do. I couldn't read people as well as I do._

_I guess it's high time that I moved on. I now know that I have people around me ready to be here for me when I have a problem. Or when I want to. People that I can call my friends without having to double-guess what their real motives are. Putting up with me during this whole time kinda made them ace the test of trust. I also know that, I order to do so, I have to drag a certain soldier with me along the way, so we can 'heal' together. It's sad to live in a world you cannot trust._

_"Надо всем верить, иначе жить нельзя." Елена Андреевна в Дядя Ваня, Антон Павлович Чехов_

_"You must trust and believe in people or life becomes impossible." Elena Andreyevna in Uncle Vanya, Anton Pavlovich Chekhov_

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**

**And ta-daa!**

**I really would like to thank all of those who have read my story, and most particularly the ones who took their time to review it, giving me their thoughts about it. This is my first reviewed story, and all of those comments really mean a lot to me. (I admit, I have become review-dependent).**

**So thank you for bearing with me until the end, I hope that this story didn't disappoint you (much) and that you enjoyed reading it. Anyway, I really enjoyed writing it.**

**Until next time!**


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